Aprons + Mitts +Towels

Perfect Hostess Gifts! With our awesome collection of Aprons, Oven Mitt and Tea Towels, you can suit up and protect yourself while slicing, dicing, baking or cooking, or you may find yourself with an overcooked bun in the oven, sauce all over your favorite shirt, or a scorched hand!  A righteous assortment of fun and original gifts for your favorite foodie or aspiring chef.  Our delightfully unique kitchen apparel will sure to bring some extra flavor to your next creation.

This Is F*cking Delicious Oven Mitt

$12.99

You know that meal was f*cking delicious, so why not pat yourself on the back with our This is F*cking Delicious Oven Mitt! A tasty juxtaposition of saccharine sweet and hilariously profane. Everyone loves baked mac and cheese. Now have some fun taking...

Lap Cat Napkins

$8.99

Lap cats! No fancy feast is complete without our playful paper Lap Cat Napkins! These folded feline fur'ends are the purr'furred way to keep your whiskers clean! We mean, fur real? Mew must be kitten with those a-paw-ling table manners! It's time...

Filthy Rich Cocktail Napkins

$5.99

You're filthy, wipe your mouth! It's time to put your money where your mouth is with our Filthy Rich Cocktail Napkins! Refine your cocktail party experience with these high-quality, highfalutin napkins will keep you looking like a million bucks, even...

I Hate Everyone Too Oven Mitt

$12.99

We think our I Hate Everyone Too Oven Mitt is just about the greatest gift you can give to your best gossip dishing pal!  After all, what seals the deal for a life long friendship more than some key common interests and dislikes? On the outside,...

Get The Hell Out of My Kitchen Dish Towel

$10.99

Our deliciously distasteful Get The Hell Out of My Kitchen Dish Towel is just what the cook ordered! We don't need your half-baked ideas. Your pinch of advice, or dash of criticism. Mind your own plate and get out of our site before you become the main...

People I Want To Meet: Dogs Dish Towel

$10.99

Our totally fetching People I Want To Meet: Dogs Dish Towel puts your true feelings on display without ever having to mutt'er a word.  You much pawfer the company of dogs over... ugh. People. The ruff reality is that you happily greet any dog that...

I Want A F*cking Pizza Dish Towel

$10.99

Your prayers have been answered!  Our I Want A Fucking Pizza Dish Towel has come down from the heavens and manifested itself into your hot little hands. Why settle for some plain dishrag? You deserve an extra cheese supreme masterpiece! Remember to...

My Favorite Salad Is Wine Oven Mitt

$12.99

Our My Favorite Salad Is Wine Oven Mitt is grape for cooking drinking up a storm! Dinner, shminner. Lettuce just skip right to the good stuff! We're convinced... future generations will have figured out a way to grow bottles of wine - glass, cork...

F*ck This Sh*t Oven Mitt

$12.99

Our F*ck This Sh*t Oven Mitt is the perfect kitchen accessory for the sometimes-struggling domestic goddess. Some days you win. And other days, you just end up making a series of small fires in the kitchen. It's ok - that's what pizza delivery is for...

Clusterf*ck Dish Towel

$10.99

Embrace the almighty and apparently unavoidable clusterfuck with our Blue Q Clusterf*ck Dish Towel. Whether that clusterfuck refers to your disaster known as your kitchen, your day, your week, your love life, your lack of love life, your home, your...

Hellraiser Oven Mitt

$12.99

Just like our sweet and innocent Hellraiser Oven Mitt your meals may look all wholesome and homemade, but you know the truth. You're the kind of brassy babe who would buy a frozen lasagna, heat it up in a nice pan, and call it a Dish to Pass. And we love...

Eat Up, B*tches Woven Dish Towel

$12.99

Serve up some snark with our Eat Up, Bitches Woven Dish Towel! Dish towels are like the socks of the kitchen! So why not add some trash talking and personality to your favorite room in the house? It's the perfect gift, because everyone needs...

Pizza's Here Oven Mitt

$12.99

*DING DONG* Our Pizza's Here Oven Mitt has arrived just in time to save the day (and your family from another burnt dinner!) Pizza delivery comes to the rescue again. Who's a hero? YOU'RE A HERO. Congratulations, my dear. Please, have a slice. On...

Humans Are My Side B*tch Cat Dish Towel

$10.99

If cats could talk our Humans Are My Side Bitch Cat Dish Towel would sum up their felines purrfectly. No, it doesn't read "rub my belly, leave me alone" but the message is the same! "Humans are my side bitch, solitude is my main bitch." But hey, that's...

My Safe Word Is Takeout Dish Towel

$10.99

Our My Safe Word Is Takeout Dish Towel addresses a serious(ly funny) issue. We know that, these days, Take-Out is still a taboo subject. But just because people aren't talking about it doesn't mean that they're not out there doing it. We're just saying...

You're Doing F*cking Great! Woven Dish Towel

$12.99

Inspire confidence and encourage laughter with our You're Doing Fucking Great! Woven Dish Towel! Don't settle for a basic dish rag. Dish towels are like the socks of the kitchen! So, go on and add some kick ass personality to your favorite room in the...

Hangry Wolf Dish Towel

$12.99

Lookout! Our Hangry Wolf Dish Towel is on the prowl. And he'll huff, and he'll puff, and he'll scarf your lunch down! Our ravenous fork + knife wielding big bad wolf is back! Orange you glad this growling guy made his way onto a dish towel!? Like...

Go Away Retro Hostess Dish Towel

$10.99

Our swanky Go Away Retro Hostess Dish Towel is the perfect anti-housewarming gift. Useful, stylish, thoughtful, and hilarious! This sassy and stylish dishtowel features an awesome retro pad, with a seemingly happy hostess answering the door to excited...

You're Beautiful Don't Change Oven Mitt

$12.99

Our delightful You're Beautiful Don't Change Oven Mitt is great for serving up tasty dishes and good vibes! You're beautiful just like the afternoon sky, a branch of flowers, or a friendly little bird. Actually, no. I take that back. Those things are...

I Don't Like Anyone In The Morning Dish Towel

$10.99

Our proud and cocky I Don't Like Anyone In The Morning Dish Towel is totally relatable. Especially if you act like a giant cock in the morning. You're not the only one! Just look at the size of this rooster! This early-to-rise loud mouth is waking the...

This Is My Protest Dish Towel

$10.99

Say it loud and proud with our This Is My Protest Dish Towel! You can start by protesting making dinner, doing the dishes, and march on from there. You're a force to be reckon with, so settle for a basic dish rag? It's the perfect gift for empowered...

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