null

Best Sellers

Explore the best selling gifts at Perpetual Kid! They are bestsellers for a reason!

100% Legal Pot (Holder)

$9.99

Get Baked + Cook At The Same Time! So, what you've got here is a pot holder that LOOKS like a pot leaf! Pot ... pot. Hilarious!  Long after the novelty of this aptly-named product wears off, you'll be enjoying its quality construction and...

3D Butterfly Tattoos

$4.99

The Butterfly Effect Our vibrantly colored 3D Butterfly Tattoos are a fun and beautiful illusion! These lifelike temporary tattoos pop off your body with three-dimensional shadowing that gives the appearance of a butterfly gently resting on you. Hey,...

American Flag Face Mask

$9.99

Wear Old Glory everyday with pride! Our American Flag Face Mask is a fun and functional way to celebrate patriotism this summer! Wear it with pride, wear it for the 4th and wear it as your go-to mask. This mask is sewn of three layers of soft touch...

Anniversary Of Your Birth Birthday Card

$4.99

Happy you-wrecked-your-mom Day! Give your friends the Anniversary Of Your Birth Birthday Card because saying Happy Cake Day is just too normal nowadays! It's just a fun reminder that they were pushed out of their mom on this day. Let's celebrate! Thank...

Ask Your Doctor If Shutting The F*ck Up Is Right For You Gum

$1.99

Take the doctor's advice! Warning: Side effects may include me being way happier than I was before you shut the fuck up.  Includes 8 pieces of candy-coated mint-flavored gum in a dainty box.  Measures 2.75 inches long x 1.25 inches wide. Ask...

Astronaut Vanilla Ice Cream Sandwich

$3.99

Out Of This World! Our Astronaut Vanilla Ice Cream Sandwich takes the ice cream you know and love, and with the power of freeze-drying to create a yummy retro treat! Since the early NASA Mercury Missions, space food has gone global! Today, Astronaut...

B*tch I Am The Secret Ingredient Dish Towel

$10.99

BTFU What may be an in-salt to some, our B*tch I Am The Secret Ingredient Dish Towel is the perfect gift for the seasoned chef, who uses a heavy dose humor and wit. Featuring a colorful and classic repetitive design, it's reminiscent of our...

Backyard Hopscotch Water Sprinkler

$24.99

Just a hop, skip and a jump to play! Your kids will never be bored this summer (not totally guaranteed) with our Backyard Hopscotch Water Sprinkler!  Playing hopscotch on an inflatable sprinkler is just mind-blowing summer fun!  Water comes up...

Bag Of Unicorn Farts

$8.99

Top Unicorn Gift! Ode to Bag of Unicorn Farts  |  Sugar is sweet, lemons are tart.  |  We love you more than a Bag of Unicorn Farts! A perfect gift for the lovers, the dreamers and you!  It's not an illusion... we've...

Best Buds Mint Gum

$1.99

Guaranteed Good Shit To Share With A Cannabis Loving Buddy The rumors are true... our gum has gone to pot! Our Best Buds Gum has been made with a very special, mind-altering ingredient. It's not CBD... It's just LOVE. Love of amazing art and design...

Bob Ross Temporary Tattoos

$7.99

No mistakes, only happy accidents! It's time to get creative with our Bob Ross Temporary Tattoos. Open up your shop at home or work and start applying these fun tattoos to all your friends! These tattoos have fun and inspirational messages like Trees...

Bob Ross The Joy of Painting Sticky Notes

$7.99

Let's get a little crazy here! Our happy little Bob Ross The Joy of Painting Sticky Notes features images Bob Ross and his unforgettable work. There are hundreds of handy notes and page markers to keep your place, keep your notes, and keep your...

Bottle Top Birthday Candle

$5.99

Beer is better than cake! The amazing Skumps Bottle Top Candle is the perfect celebratory accessory for your best pal who is on a steady liquid diet for the evening! Just pop it into a bottle and start singing! Use this attention grabbing bottle...

Car Full of Cats Auto Sunshade

$17.99

Fur-real! No kitten! Our meow-nificently fun Car Full of Cats Auto Sunshade will instantly convert any vehicle into a catmobile!  We knead not to mention, but, it's quickly clawing to the top the top of every cat lover's list!  After, all if...

Car Full of Rubber Chickens Auto Sunshade

$17.99

Keeps your car from getting as hot as a rotisserie oven Looking at our Car Full of Rubber Chickens Auto Sunshade, you can imagine that these five Rubber Chickens just flew the coop in your car. They’re on the run from the fox police with permanent...

Cat Butt Gum

$1.99

Cute As A Butt-on Gum If you've got a lot of attitude to pass around, this gum is just right for you! Includes 8 peppermint pieces of "Kiss My Ass" attitude per box. Get a second box because you've got a lot of attitude to share. Meow! What are you...

Cat Lady Car Stickers

$8.99

How many cats is too many?  One, two, three, four, sixteen  we havent quite figured that one out yet.  The more the merrier, we say!    Express your love for all of your furr-avorite feline friends with our van-tastic Cat Lady...

Cattitude Mug

$17.99

Escape the wrath of the nails and hissing! Grab your favorite warm beverage with our Cattitude Mug. It's the purr-fect cup of cattitude and a guide to feline foibles. Never get scratched again with this a-meow-zing guide to your cat’s crazy mood...

CBD Gummy Bears

$24.99

Oh, I'm a CBD Gummy Bear.... a CBD Gummy Bear.  I'm a yummy, edible, social anxiety reducing gummy bear! What a long strange trip it's been getting CBD Gummy Bears to the market, but we're so Grateful they've finally made it! Now that they're...

Chakra Crystals Stone Gift Pack

$17.99

open ○ release ○ balance Feeling out of whack? Check out our Chakra Crystal Stone Pack!  Sounds like it's high time you chill out, recenter, and realign yourself with the universe. Lucky you! We've got just the tools you need to help you along your...

Coconut Basil Lip Shit

$6.99

Cruelty Free Lip Balm We are giving you a rare opportunity to be a ukulele lady (or gentlemen) and we'll be a monkey's uncle if you don't love our Coconut Basil Lip Shit!  It is made from a beeswax formula and is extremely smooth and easy-to-apply...

Coconut Cocktail Sipper

$15.99

Sip, slurp... repeat! Kick that summer tiki party up a notch with a Coconut Cocktail Sipper! Load it up with 20 ice cold ounces of your favorite Pina Colada recipe, or juice for the kiddos! Holds 20 ounces Food safe + BPA free Reusable straw with...

Coolest Guy On The Conference Call Men's Socks

$12.99

Does your boss schedule calls to schedule calls?  Ugh.  At least you can have some fun with it!  Now these are for the coolest guy, which is NOT the person that talks the most.  That guy just likes to hear himself talk. Probably the...

CrunchCup

$21.99

It's better than spooning! Hasta la vista soggy cereal! The CrunchCup keeps your cereal crunchy... yep, life changing! The milk and cereal don't actually meet until they hit your mouth. Your cereal can now easily be portable, you don't need to lug...

Cute Little F*ckers Woodland Creature Dish Towel

$10.99

I Love Cooking For Those Cute Little Fuckers! Our Cute Little F*ckers Woodland Creature Dish Towel is like the center of a Venn diagram, in which the big circles are Norman Rockwell and Kinda Fucked Up. It's where your idyllic childhood and adulthood...

CYMK Pen

$7.99

Sketch in full color! Every color can be created by combining the 4 colours; Cyan, Magenta, Yellow & Black. Change inks with the sliding selectors, coloured ink tubes in the clear nib provide visual confirmation. Experiment, doodle, sketch, get...

Dancing with Jesus Mini Bobbling Figurine + Book

$10.99

Lord Almighty! Jesus sure has some righteous moves! Our Dancing with Jesus: Mini Bobbling Figurine + Book is truly a God send! Are your dance moves unrighteous?  Do you refrain from getting down, lest others judge you cruelly?  Fear not...

Day Drinking Candle

$19.99

It's something o'clock somewhere. Our non-judgmental Day Drinking Candle is the perfect candle for those who like to pour a little bourbon in their coffee in the morning and follow it with a wine spritzer for lunch. The numbers on the clock don't mean...

Deer A**hole Greeting Card

$4.99

Deer A**hole, return my calls Our funny, but frank, Deer A**hole Greeting Card is definitely a card for those friends and family who love to laugh. A great card for when someone does something (they know what they did) and it needs to be called out with...

Disappointed Sigh Sound Machine

$10.99

Automated dismay Our meh Disappointed Sigh Sound Machine makes sure that no annoyance goes unacknowledged ever again. Four sighs include a male, female, shocked and end of the world. With our press-of-the-button automated dismay, you can express your...

Discover Box: Crystals Stone Gift Pack

$17.99

Life is like a box of crystals  Our fun and colorful Discover Box: Crystals Stone Gift Pack is a super cool way to introduce a curious soul to the awesome properties of crystals! Written for inquisitive beginners it's a great starter kit with many...

Dog Butt Magnets

$12.99

Butt's up? It's hard enough to find a magnet to keep your bills and pictures on the refrigerator, but even worse trying to find magnets that are loyal and obedient! If you're a dog lover who also needs to attach things to magnetic surfaces, use our Dog...

Donut Touch My Lunch Bag

$18.99

As sweet as it gets! There's no need to sugar coat it, our Frosted Donut Lunch Tote is as sweet as it gets! The "holey" grail of lunch pails, this pink glazed beauty with colorful sprinkles will leave the cool kids begging for you to sit at their table...

Dressed To Spill Sailor Bib + Teether Set

$19.99

Ahoy crabbies, it's mealtime! Believe it or naut, our Dressed To Spill Sailor Bib + Teether Set will make watching your baby fuss over eating their veggies a reel'y fun experience! Even when your little one is cussing like a baby sailor! Have a baby...

Droppin' A Recipe On Your Ass Oven Mitt

$12.99

Drop it like it's hot. Get ready to cook up some fun with our Droppin' A Recipe On Your Ass Oven Mitt! Whether you're a Pinterest Mistress or a natural born chef, you'll instantly become smitten with this mitten as it makes presenting your latest...

Drumstick Pen Set

$8.99

I just want to bang on my desk all day! You know that person, maybe it's you... the fidgety pen tapper! They'll pick up just about anything and tap out an impromptu drum solo, like they're playing to a crowd of thousands - not a water cooler and the...

Dude Approved Soft Touch Black Face Mask

$8.99

A mask to match his style! Our Dude Approved Soft Touch Black Face Mask is perfect for the guys that are too shy to wear the cute mask you may have already picked up for him!   This go-to men's mask for those quick manly runs to pick up...

Evidence Tote

$6.99

WARNING: Do not tamper with the contents of our zippered Evidence Tote! This is not a toy in any circumstance unless you're playing beat up the person stealing the evidence. There's even a seal that says OFFICIAL PROPERTY DO NOT OPEN. So were pretty...

F*cking Meetings Candle

$19.99

Smells like this could have been an email... Our angst-poured Fucking Meetings Candle is for anyone that has been called to a meeting that was really about nothing... or at least should've just been a group email regarding the subject. The candle has a...

Filing Saucer UFO Paper Clip Holder

$11.99

Desk Space Invaders Don't let your paper clips get lost in the black hole of your desk drawer. Our Flying "Filing" Saucer paperclip holder  magnetically "abducts" the included cow-shaped clips so they're ready to organize all your classified...

Flash + Fly Helicopter

$2.99

A great toys for kids and husbands! Because there is nothing more entertaining than shooting flashing things into the air and watching them come back down. Seriously. What could be better? Turn on our Fly and Flash Helicopter and sling shot it into the...

Fowl Language Mug

$17.99

Fowl-mouthed fine feathered friends! Some of our feathered friends are positively fowl-mouthed and our amusing Fowl Language Mug features a collection of seemingly innocent birds, all with rather rude names. This is the perfect mug for any bird...

Fuck It All Pen Set

$9.99

Great conversational pens! When the moment serves, you'll be ready with our Fuck It All Pen Set! Keep the whole five pen collection ready at your desk or carry your favorite one that seems to cover all the bases at all times! The Fuck It All Pen Set is...

Get Along With Your Co-Workers Gum

$1.99

Your Job Doesn't Suck, Just Your Co-Workers The reality in the majority of people's lives is that they have to get a job to survive. Unfortunately you get stuck working alongside people you might not otherwise frequent in the free world! To make your...

Giant Ice Cream Cone Lamp

$79.99

Just 150,000 Calories! There are just few things in life that are as enjoyable as an ice cream cone!  What better way can you think of to brighten up the mood in your home or office than with a Giant Ice Cream Cone lamp!  Marvel your guests as...

Greetings From Lake Wine Dish Towel

$10.99

Our delightfully retro Greetings From Lake Wine Dish Towel is a nod to everyone's favorite vacation in a bottle. Now, don't tell anyone. We don't want this place overrun with tourists. This colorful kitchen towel resembles a postcard and features a...

Happy Camper DIY Pencil Holder

$12.99

Kitschy camper for your crayons!  Simply assemble and you're ready to park our retro-styled Happy Camper Pencil Holder on your desk.  Toss in your pens and pencils, kick back and relax! Then you can start planning your next grand adventure (or...

Hatch and Grow Sloth

$4.99

Just add water – and hang around!  Our Hatch and Grow Sloth doesn't need any food or special care. Just add water and watch him grow and break out of his tree stump.  So, how does it work? Sit back, and relax. This little fella...

Helping Hands Chopsticks

$4.99

Looks like your chopstick skills could use a helping hand. Please, a tiny round of applause for our Helping Hands Chopsticks, which were recently featured on BuzzFeed! Hilariously adorable they also make it perfectly okay to eat with your hands, in any...

Holy Toast Bread Stamp

$4.99

Holy Mother Of God... what is on my toast! In the beginning...there was bread. Ho hum. Make that boring bread an inspiration by embossing it before you toast! Our easy-to-use HOLY TOAST stamper always makes a good impression. Press the stamper into an...

Hot Dog Bandages

$5.99

Turn whiners into wieners in no time! We're going to be frank, our Hot Dog Bandages are real wieners! No one likes scrapes, cuts and bruises but everyone relishes at the idea of covering them up with these super cute Hot Dog Bandages. They're definitely...

Huggy Tiny Tree Frog Ear Cuff

$4.99

Your good luck charm! They say that when a lucky frog comes into your life that it's a sign of transformation and it may well spark many wonderful changes! Well that's just a little bit more than a tad exciting!  Our single Tiny Hugging Tree Frog...

I Hate Everyone Too Oven Mitt

$12.99

We think our I Hate Everyone Too Oven Mitt is just about the greatest gift you can give to your best gossip dishing pal!  After all, what seals the deal for a life long friendship more than some key common interests and dislikes? On the outside,...

I'll Feed All You F*ckers Oven Mitt

$12.99

Hungry? Embracing the challenges of fatherhood our I'll Feed All You F*ckers Oven Mitt is a nod to the king of the BBQ! What's that? You brought some friends home from school? You invited the neighborhood over for dinner? When will dinner be ready?...

I'm A Delicate F*cking Flower Gum

$1.99

Decorated with equally colorful language our I'm A Delicate F*cking Flower Gum is perfect for those frequent moments when you need to send a direct message to the person standing next to you (and you've also just consumed a lot of garlic.) For those days...

Inflatable Crocodile Sprinkler

$24.99

You croc my world! Beat the heat this summer with a cute Inflatable Crocodile Outdoor Water Sprinkler. Enjoy cute and cool outdoor adventures for family fun in the sun! Non-toxic Phthalate free, PVC. Includes hose adapter: fits onto most domestic...

Instantly Talk With Your Cat Gum

$1.99

Just once piece of our Instantly Talk With Your Cat Gum unlocks the dialogue between you and your pet!  You'll finally be able to share your intimate dreams and fears, stock tips, recipes and who you think should be kicked off Big Brother next! For...

Intoxication Citation Notepad

$4.99

Serious partying is not as easy as it looks.   It takes fortitude, commitment and most of all a strong constitution.  Let our unbeerlievably accurate and equally hilarious Intoxication Citation Notepad aid you in formally recognizing fellow...

iPlunge Phone Stand

$7.99

As seen in Wired Magazine! High-tech meets low tech and the coolest accessory for your phone was born.   iPlunge is the perfect solution for your video emergencies just squish it against the back of your iPod, iPhone, or any device with a smooth...

Sign Up For The Latest Coupons, Product Launches + Secret Sales