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Candy

Looking for some tasty treats to stuff your face with?  Check out our collection of candy, chocolate, popcorn, and more aimed to satisfy nearly every sugary sweet, or sinfully salty craving under the sun!  You'll find super yummy gift ideas too if you're willing to part with them!

CBD Sour Gummy Smiling Emojis

$24.99

CBD edibles have arrived! Good luck trying to wipe that smile off your face! Too peopley outside? No problem! Reach for your jar of CBD Sour Gummy Smiling Emojis and your social anxiety will run for the hills, instead of you! These smiley face...

CBD Gummy Bear Party Pack 3000mg

$119.99

Keep Calm and Munch On Yummy CBD Gummies Introducing our mega-huge CBD Gummy Bear Party Pack 3000mg!  Personally, we eat our CBD gummy bears two at at time. So they don't have to die alone.  We're thoughtful like that. CBD...

CBD Gummy Party Pack 3000mg

$119.99

There's a CBD party in my tummy! Feeling funny, feeling funny... You may enjoy the occasional Yo Gabba Gabba episode, but our CBD Gummy Party Pack are for adults only! They do not contain THC - rather they do contain the super awesome power of CBD oil...

CBD Gummy Watermelon Rings

$24.99

Feeling a bit melon-choly? Our CBD infused edibles will save the day! Formulated with cannabidiol our CBD Gummy Watermelon Rings help to promote an awesome sense of calm and overall wellness,  CBD is short for cannabidiol...

CBD Gummy Worms

$24.99

CBD is legal in all 50 states, y'all! Why settle for vaping or salves when our CBD Gummy Worms are just like the ones you remember from your childhood! These squirmy little wormies taste, look, smell, and feel the same. The only difference is that they...

CBD Gummy Ribbons

$24.99

Double rainbow edibles!? What does it mean?? Take a trip outside of your typical comfort zone with our yummy CBD Gummy Ribbons! Say what? With the anti-anxiety and stress-reducing effects of CBD oil, you'll quickly be on your way a relaxing and...

CBD Gummy Peach Rings

$24.99

These cannabidiol edibles will leave you feeling just peachy! It's no coincidence our CBD Gummy Peach Rings are shaped like tiny life savers, for they truly are! These tasty little treats pack a substantial punch with 25mg of CBD per piece...

CBD Gummy Cherries

$24.99

Feel CBD cherrific before you know it! Our CBD Gummy Cherries edibles are the ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb!  This is not your mom's high school weed! Feeling a bit stressed or anxious? Pop a couple of these in your mouth and you'll feel your worries...

CBD Gummy Blueberry Rings

$24.99

CBD edibles shaped as tiny life savers - coincidence? We think naut! Our CBD Gummy Blueberry Rings are here to come to the rescue! These tasty little hemp oil candies pack a substantial punch with 25mg of CBD per piece. Don't know what CBD is? Allow us...

CBD Gummy Bears

$24.99

Oh, I'm a CBD Gummy Bear.... a CBD Gummy Bear.  I'm a yummy, edible, social anxiety reducing gummy bear! What a long strange trip it's been getting CBD Gummy Bears to the market, but we're so Grateful they've finally made it! Now that they're...

CBD Gummy Apple Rings

$24.99

An apple a day keeps the stress away! *If that apple is a CBD edible that is!* Don’t be fooled by their innocent appearance! Our potent CBD Gummy Apple Rings may ring of nostalgia, but these candies contain approximately 25mg of CBD per...

Bitch, Be Cool Gum

$1.99

What up, dawg. Introducing our savagely fun Bitch, Be Cool Gum. Did you think we were above putting the word "bitch" next to an image of a dog just for a good laugh? You were wrong. If you didn't read the phrase on our Bitch, Be Cool Gum in Samuel L...

Procrastinate Like There Is A Tomorrow Gum

$1.99

Dance like everyone is watching! Our deliciously cheeky Procrastinate Like There Is A Tomorrow Gum is a fun little gift punctuated with minty flavor and biting humor! Behold a cool and minty present with a message that is sure to strike a chord with your...

Let That Shit Go Gum

$1.99

Take two deep breaths and call me in the morning. Our thought-provoking and breath freshening Let That Shit Go Gum features the Medicine Buddha encouraging you to move on bruh. Seriously. It was like 4 years ago and it wasn't even that big of a deal...

Go Away I'm Introverting Gum

$1.99

Make that a nope for me. Our straight-to-the-point Go Away I'm Introverting Gum is just what you need on you in case of a social annoyance crisis. Don't even bother making eye contact or parting your lips. Just be friendly by offering them a piece of...

Gummy Hot Dog

$7.99 $6.65

Wiener, wiener, gummy dinner! Quite frankly, our Hot Dog Gummy should probably not be eaten for dinner... but it's a fun treat that may last the whole ballgame! Made of 20 of fruit flavored gummy candies, it features sweet buns & gummy toppings!...

Gummy Candy Burger

$7.99

A whopper of a Gummy! Made of 22 delicious candies, The Original Gummy Candy Burger is a concept that is well-done! Complete with see-thru cardboard burger box, it's the king of all gummies! 6 sweet candy top bun slices 6 candy cheese n sauce gummy...

Rare Pickle Rick Gummy Candy

$6.99

I'M A PICKLE! I'm pickle Riiiiiick! Rick's in quite the pickle! Our Pickle Rick Gummy Candy has confirmed that Rick has gone and Boom! Big Reveal! turned himself into a gummy version of his Pickle Rick self! Disturbingly accurate Pickle...

Super-Size Ball Swirl Lollipop

$6.99 $5.85

You'd better ball-lieve it, sweetness! Our bright and colorful Super-Size Ball Swirl Lollipops are only for the truly dedicated sweet tooth. At its size it's probably going to take you more than one sitting! Impressive 2 inches in diameter = long...

Sugar Bear Lollipop

$3.99 $3.25

Oh, I'm a Sugar BearYeah, I'm a Sugar Bear Our handmade, happy-go-lucky Sugar Bear Lollipops are hard candy doppelgangers of the original gummy bears! They're it on a stick!  Available in a rainbow of colors and flavors! Red (cherry) Orange...

Fudge-Pop Lollipops

$3.99

Oh, Fudge!  We feel like a kid in a candy shop! Our eye catching Fudge-Pop Lollipops are available in 6 different color/flavor combinations... How will we ever decide!? Strawberry/Chocolate (Pink & Brown) Vanilla/Chocolate (White & Brown)...

Spicy Chili Pepper Lollipop

$4.99

Are you a sucker for spicy food?  Lovers of spicy food will just eat up our handmade Spicy Chili Pepper Lollipops! Each one of these chili-pepper-shaped hard candy pops is infused with real chili pepper bits, and pack a heat that can't be beat!...

Glitter Swirl Slime Lollipop

$3.99

You've been slimed! Our colorful Glitter Swirl Slime Lollipop is delicious, sparkly, gross out fun candy treat! Whether your love of slime originated with You Can't Do That On Television or Ghostbusters, we don't know (gah! we've been slimed!) But what...

Giant Ice Cream Cone Lollipop

$7.99

Psst... We've got the inside scoop Our Giant Dipped Ice Cream Cone is eye candy that's real candy! These gorgeous and colorful ice cream shaped lollipops that have been handmade and dipped in a flavored hard candy (crafted from a secret 75 year old...

Galaxy Lollipop

$4.99

A lollipop light years ahead of its time Our spectacular handmade Galaxy Lollipops are flat out the sweetest gift this side of the Milky Way. Hand-poured and swirled purple + black circular lollipop Embedded with glitter and adorned with silver star...

Cream-Pop Lollipops

$3.99

They're the cream of the crop! A dream-cicle come true, our Cream-Pop Lollipops are designed to look like classic ice-cream pops! They come on a thick wooden pop-sicle stick in six different exciting color and flavor combinations! Strawberry/Vanilla...

Rainbow Puke Lollipop

$4.99

Time to throw on your galoshes! Our Rainbow Puke Lollipop is so fantastic it has the entire Perpetual Kid staff literally puking rainbows! This lovable abomination of nature looks like a rainbow threw up all over our unsuspecting lollipop, and...

Narwhal Sneeze Lollipop

$4.99

What's blue and green and sparkly all over? Our Narwhal Sneeze Lollipop by Melville Candy! This particular pop was embedded with glittery ocean blue and phlegm green sanding sugar then hand-poured on to a wooden popsicle stick. To add another layer...

Body Part Lollipop

$2.49 $2.05

Our super creepy Body Part Halloween Lollipop are the pefect aaddition to any zombie buffet! With Human Hearts, Witch Fingers, Eyeballs and Brains they're the perfect trick AND treat for Halloween!  Bloodshot Eyeball- Cotton Candy Flavored...

I'm Not Sarcastic, I'm Just Mean Gum

$1.99

Uh, oh! They've found us out! Our I'm Not Sarcastic, I'm Just Mean Gum is dropping truth bombs by way of delicious chicklet-sized mint gum! A fun item to have for those moments when you don't have time for humility. If they didn't get the message at...

At Least The Couch Thinks I've Got A Great Ass. Gum

$1.99

Super Cheeky Ass-piring Candy Our super cheeky At Least The Couch Thinks I've Got A Great Ass. Gum is totally relatable for those of us who are in a committed long-term relationship with our surrogate beds. Listen, when a couch hands you a compliment,...

Look! I'm Wearing The Smile You Gave Me Gum

$1.99

Everyone Will Whaley Love This CandyWhale, hello there! We noticed our Look! I'm Wearing The Smile You Gave Me Gum has gotten your attention with it's perpetu-whale grin! Will you take this whale to be your very best friend? Pretty please, with some...

National Embarrassmints

$2.99

Trump your bad breath with a mint! Our Donald Trump National Embarrassmints are pretty darn puny don't ya think?  We hope these mints don't offend you!  We had some Hillary ones too, but they were just picked up by black van full of...

Trump Impeachmints

$2.99

Without any evidence, this is the best the left can do! Our totally offensive Trump Impeachmints are for bad hombres with bad breath, and worse vocabulary. Do you bad-mouth people? Drop one of these peach flavored mints on your tongue and you'll make...

Legendary Unicorn Mints

$3.99 $3.25

Our frolicking awesome Legendary Unicorn Mints are an example of all that is right with the world. Or at least the fantasy world inside of your head!   Chances are, if you love unicorns as much as we do (which may just be impossible) simply...

I'm Not Emotionally Dead, But It Sounds Amazing Gum

$1.99

Emotionally exhausted from being dragged by the drama llama? Our I'm Not Emotionally Dead, But It Sounds Amazing Gum was made for you. You know what they say: the grass is always greener on the other side of the emotionally-dead fence! Ahhh. Wouldn't it...

Here's Your Gift Motherf*cker Gum

$1.99

The Perfect Present For Someone That's In The Family But Not In The CircleOur Here's Your Gift Motherfucker Gum turns the art of obligatory gift giving into something truly amazing.  A perfect cheap and useful gift for someone you love or love to...

F*ck Me Like The Government Gum

$1.99

Most Prefer A Pretty Lie And This Gum Is An Uncomfortable Truth Unlike a scalding hot cup of covfefe our Fuck Me Like The Government Gum will leave a good taste in your mouth. A deliciously fun political gift for anyone who distrusts the government...

It's Not Really Drinking Alone If The Cat Is Home Gum

$1.99

Our thought provoking, It's Not Really Drinking Alone If The Cat Is Home Gum really gave us something to chew on! Meow, we've always really admired one's ability to argue a point. Those crazy cat ladies are really onto something! This gum is the purrfect...

I'm A Delicate F*cking Flower Gum

$1.99

Decorated with equally colorful language our I'm A Delicate F*cking Flower Gum is perfect for those frequent moments when you need to send a direct message to the person standing next to you (and you've also just consumed a lot of garlic.) For those days...

Instant Rhythm Gum

$1.99 $1.55

Give Dad A Piece Of This Gum Next Time He's Driving And Playing Steering Wheel Drums To The Radio Do you know someone that can't dance? Our Instant Rhythm Gum for Awkward dancers works in a snap! Directions for Use: At the first sound of music,...

Accept That You've Had A Baby Gum

$1.99

Instant Reality Check, Someone Owns You For Atleast Another 18 YearsOur Accept That You've Had A Baby Gum is the mother of all baby shower gifts, and the cheekiest way to deliver an instant reality check! Time to face it buttercup, your life will never...

I Don't Need Directions, I Have A Penis Gum

$1.99

Candy Coated Gum For Guys With Built In GPS Our refreshingly crass I Don't Need Directions, I Have A Penis Gum isn't afraid to tell it like it is. Stop the car! I'm getting out... a piece of gum to cut this tension with some much needed laughter. Fragile...

You Leave Sparkles Everywhere You Go Gum

$1.99

Share A Piece Of This Gum When You Enjoy Someone's Good Vibes Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for a rainy day... If you forgot to take Mr. Como's advice, our totally dreamy You Leave Sparkles Wherever You Go Gum is a close runner...

I'm Sorry I Called You An Asshole, I Thought You Knew Gum

$1.99

Everyone Should Carry A Lot Of This Gum To Save The Planet By Calling All The Assholes OutSometimes you have to remind people that you can be an asshole too.  That's why it's best to carry our I'm Sorry I Called You An Asshole I Thought You Knew Gum...

Wash Your Dirty Mouth Out Candy Soap Lollipops

$4.99

Raising the Bar on Nostalgic Candy Got a bad mouth with a sweet tooth? Then our naughty but nice Wash Your Dirty Mouth Out Candy Soap Lollipops will sweeten that deliciously vulgar pie hole of yours. A throwback to the good ole days when having your...

Barf Lollipop

$3.99 $3.25

Like, Gag Me With A Lollipop The ultimate gag gift... our Barf Lollipop is a deliciously fun way to share your utter disgust at a situation or person, or to just gross out the person you're closest with... just because you can. To up the puke factor this...

Blood Sucker Lollipop

$3.99

It's Bloody Good Candy! We're O (so) positive that you'll be totally grossed out yet equally intrigued by our sickening sweet Blood Sucker Lollipop, that we're willing to bet the blood bank on it! With their "Unusual Tastes" Harry Potter fans will...

Fresh + Fruity Scented Neon Gel Crayon Highlighters

$9.99

Drop what you're doing! There’s no need to settle for a boring highlighter when you can reach for something fresh!  Our phenomenal Fresh + Fruity Scented Neon Gel Crayon Highlighters set is everything you need and want when making...

Namaste Motherf**ker Snarky Tea

$14.99

The choice of a new generation of yogis. Our Namaste Mother F**ker Snarky Tea is quenching the inner thirst of the new wave of snarky yoga practitioners. That's right. There's a new set of yogis in town, and we’re here for the elastic waistbands,...

Get Your Sh*t Together Snarky Tea

$14.99

Okay, so you really need to work on your life at the moment... Our Get Your Sh*t Together Snarky Tea can help. What's that? You need a recap? You went out with co-workers last night and performed karaoke in front of your boss. You may or may not have...

Fierce B*tch Snarky Tea

$14.99 $12.65

Stay bold, stay snarky...  Yaaaaaaaas. The heavens have shined upon you with a celestial light of fiery fierceness and you’re absolutely killing it. When you walk by, flowers perk up and haters bow down. Two snaps and a clap – the queen...

Calm The F**k Down Tea Snarky Tea

$14.99

Adulting is hard.    Like, really hard.     Our Calm The F*ck Down Snarky Tea can help. You’re late for work and there’s crazy traffic. There’s mascara in your eye, concealer on your white pants and to top it off,...

I Need More Money And Power And Less Sh*t From You People Gum

$1.99

Smile and nod.  Smile and nod.  Make sure to wear your mouth guard at night, so you don't grind your teeth down to nubs. You may not be able to lighten the workload at the office, but you sure can lighten the mood with our I Need More Money and...

My Favorite Salad Is Wine Gum

$1.99

Candy Coated Fruit Flavored Awesomeness That Won't Get You Drunk You say tomato, we say wine.  With our My Favorite Salad Is Wine Gum you can just lay it all out on the lunch table.  Because, we don't carrot all what you think, unless you agree...

The Difference Between Pizza And Your Opinion Gum

$1.99

We imagine that this is what the Lady said to the Tramp, right before she walked out of the Red Sauce Joint they once called "our place."  It's a sad story, but it's a pretty funny gum. Our extra saucy The Difference Between Pizza and Your...

You Are Better Than The Best Gum

$1.99

Candy Coated Gum That's Great For Narcissistic Bosses Because They're The BesssssstYou're the best around!  Nothing's gonna ever keep you down! No really, you are.  No, YOU are.  Okay, let's just agree to disagree. What we can agree on is...

My Sweatpants Think You're Pathetic Gum

$1.99 $1.55

Whatever, Karen. Our snarky My Sweatpants Think You're Pathetic Gum is the perfectly absurd rebuttal for when you're too deep into your own (Netflix) marathon training and simply too chill to care.  If you're like us, you're exhausted from sight...

Cute But Psycho. But Cute. Gum

$1.99

Candy Coated Gum For The UnpredictableSometimes, just sometimes... being perpetually cute comes with a price and our Cute But Psycho But Cute Gum pretty much sums it up perfectly, in the cutest way possibly of course. A fun cautionary gift for when it's...

I Want To Go On Eternity Leave Gum

$1.99

Candy For Times When You Need A Neverending VacationThere are palm trees, beach umbrellas, perfectly-sweetened margaritas and no hangovers... I'm never coming back.  Please hold my calls.  Forever. That settles it, we're sold on our I Want To...