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Birthday Cards + Gifts

So, don't be the party pooper who brings another boring gift or a generic greeting card. Join the laughter revolution at Perpetual Kid, where birthdays are hilarious... no mater how many you've had! Viewer discretion is advised... we're not responsible for sore bellies due to excessive laughing! 😂🎉
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    Here's Your Gift Motherf*cker Gum

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    The Perfect Present For Someone That's In The Family But Not In The Circle Our Here's Your Gift Motherfucker Gum turns the art of obligatory gift g...

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    Happy Birthday! Party Time Retro Scratch 'n Sniff Stinky Stickers

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    Happy Birthday! Scratch 'n Sniff Stinky Stickers Celebrate in style with Happy Birthday! Party Time Retro Scratch 'n Sniff Stinky Stickers. These s...

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    Vanilla Cupcake Scented Pen

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    This scented pen really takes the cake! Cupcakes are ALWAYS a GOOD idea! So is having a favorite pen on you! Our yummy Vanilla Cupcake Scented Pen ...

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    UR Classic VHS Tape Birthday Card

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    Set the stage for a Blockbuster of a Birthday! Be kind and rewind send our UR Classic VHS Tape Birthday Card to a dear friend that has stood the te...

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    Party For One Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin Candle

    Last One! In stock, ready to ship

    Celebrate your alone time! Kick back and enjoy the unadulterated awesomeness that is you with our Party For One Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin Candl...

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    Lit! Doobie Birthday Candles

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    Can weed be blunt about your birthday? Blowing out the candles will never be a drag again! For your next sesh, celebrate in style with our Lit Doob...

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    Blow Out The Candles Before They Singe Our Chin Hairs Birthday Card

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    Sometimes getting old really blows! The hilarious Blow Out The Candles Before They Singe Our Chin Hairs Off is the perfect birthday card to show yo...

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    Wow You're Pretty F*cking Old Birthday Card

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    Welcome to the beginning of the end Send our Wow You're Pretty Fucking Old Birthday Card to laugh and celebrate another year of aging! This works g...

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    Astronaut Vanilla Ice Cream Sandwich

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    Out Of This World! Our Astronaut Vanilla Ice Cream Sandwich takes the ice cream you know and love, and with the power of freeze-drying to create a ...

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    I'm Telling You Kid, Growing Old Ain't For Sissies Birthday Card

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    Get me my glasses and an ibuprofen... I'm Telling You Kid, Growing Old Ain't For Sissies... Getting older is actually pretty cool with all of the l...

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    Oh Sh*t! Has Anyone Seen My Hopes + Dreams Greeting Card

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    My love of food stopped me from going pro! Give your friend this humorous Oh Shit! Has Anyone Seen My Hopes + Dreams Greeting Card featuring a woma...

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    You Can Have Your Cake , After All It's Your F*cking Birthday Card

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    I many even go for seconds... Our You Can Have Your Cake And Eat It Too!!! After All It's Your Fucking Birthday Card perfectly defines that strong ...

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    Go Shawty! It's Sherbert-Day! Birthday Card

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    Sherbert-ly the best day ever! Celebrate birthdays with a splash of fun and flavor with our Go Shawty! It's Sherbert-Day! birthday card! So darn cu...

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    Happy Birthday Retro Scratch 'n Sniff Stinky Stickers

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    We wish you a Happy (1980's style) Birthday! Get a whiff of these smelly Happy Birthday, whipped cream-scented stickers! Scratch 'n Sniff Stinky St...

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    Happy Birthday From All The Doggies Card

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    It's time to raise the woof! đŸ¶đŸŽ‰ Are you looking for a birthday card that speaks to the heart of your favorite dog-loving, anti-people person? Look ...

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    Listen Up B*tches, We're Not Getting Older Birthday Card

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    If you were a cheese, you'd be a damn fine one. Birthdays come every year and this sassy Listen Up Bitches We're Not Getting Older, We're Getting B...

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    No One Will Love You Like I Do, Except The Dog Birthday Card

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    And they call it puppy love The ulta-mutt card for lovers and dog lovers alike our Except the Dog Birthday Card, let's them know just howl much you...

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    Astronaut Neapolitan Ice Cream Sandwich

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    Not Gonna Melt! Our fascinating Astronaut Neapolitan Ice Cream Sandwich is a tasty snack that anyone can enjoy, whether you’re out exploring the ga...

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    I Can't Adult Today Magnet

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    We need an adult. Action and responsibilities, vs. giving into the weight of the world, and the comfiness of your couch. It's a clear choice. Can ...

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    Retro Happy Birthday You Little Sh*t Birthday Card

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    Don't be a party pooper! Send our rascally Retro Happy Birthday You Little Shit Birthday Card to your friends and family, and you're guaranteed to ...

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    What Are You, Like 100? Birthday Gum

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    I'm only asking because you look GREAT for your age. Our cheeky What Are You, Like 100? Gum is a fun gift for when you get to the age where trying ...

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    Holy Crap! You're Old! But Hey, You're Still Alive Birthday Card

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    Send them rolling over the hill in laughter (just careful they don't break a hip!) While they may be accustomed to Next-Day Pony Express, our farm-...

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    Pterribly Awesome Birthday Card

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    Pterrific way to celebrate! Send birthday wishes with this Pterribly Awesome Birthday Card. Featuring a magenta pterodactyl soaring on the cover, i...

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    Retro Cakebox Happy Birthday Card

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    Life is better with cake Our Retro Cakebox Happy Birthday Card reminds us all that nothing says happy birthday like a homemade cake! Well, at least...

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