Offensive + Delightful
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Do No Harm But Take No Sh*t Greeting Card
In stockThe definition of harm can be a little forgiving... Nope, not gonna take bullshit from anyone standing in my way! Our Do No Harm But Take No Shit...
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Holy Crap! You're Old! But Hey, You're Still Alive Birthday Card
In stockSend them rolling over the hill in laughter (just careful they don't break a hip!) While they may be accustomed to Next-Day Pony Express, our farm-...
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5 Rules for Happiness, Or Just Smoke A Little Weed Greeting Card
In stockWe're stoked about this card! We'ed bet you have a few friends that would totally relate to our 5 Rules for Happiness, Or Just Smoke A Little Weed ...
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I Am Soooo Fucking Proud of You Greeting Card
In stockYou are a f'ing rock star in my book! Send our I Am Soooo Fucking Proud of You Greeting Card to let some know how serious you are about how you pro...
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Does My Ass Look Fat In This? Santa Christmas Card
In stockHave yourself a very cheeky Christmas Our s-ass-y Big Ass Santa Chrisymas Card pokes big fun at the common question heard in households and dressi...
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I Hate Babies, But I'm Still Pretty Happy For You! Greeting Card
In stockIt's just that they scare me... You're going to be a great parent, and that's cool... I Hate Babies, But I'm Still Pretty Happy For You! Since you...
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Kicking Ass + Taking Names Wild Cat Encouragement Card
In stockRawr! 💥🐈⬛📋 Nothing will stand between a cat and its prey, so continue to slay the day, kitties! And while you're at it, pounce on the chance to se...
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May These Crystals Heal The Sh*t Out Of You Greeting Card
In stockHoly shit, I can feel it! Send our May These Crystals Heal The Shit Out Of You Greeting Card to any friend who isn't feeling well or needs some pos...
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Happy Birthday To A Bad*ss Card
Last One! In stock, ready to shipYou're an ass, but in a good way! Our Happy Birthday To A Badass Mother Fucker Card is absolutely not appropriate for your grandma... Even if she i...
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Birthday Greetings, May These Crystal Heal The Shit Out Of You
In stockIs that damn Mercury in retograde again? Birthday Greetings, May These Crystal Heal The Shit Out Of You! A few rose quartz, a good helping of turqu...
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I Miss Your Sweet Ass Greeting Card
In stockI hope to see it and you soon! It's a sweet ass quality you carry so well! Send our favorite thinking of you brazen card to say "hi" and let them ...
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I Love Your Penis, It's The Best Greeting Card
In stockIt's an outstanding quality you possess! I know I've told you hundreds of times what I love about you, but this one may have slipped by... Made i...
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You Deserve A Big Ass Thank You! Greeting Card
In stockThanks a buttload! No ifs, ands, or butts about it, our You Deserve A Big Ass Thank You! Greeting Card gets your point across. It’s right in their ...
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Congrats On Your Brand New Poop Machine! Baby Card
In stockFor shits and baby giggles Because parenthood is a real gas (with lots of wiping ass), our cheeky Poop Machine New Baby Card is just what the stor...
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Happy Birthday You Old F*ck Card
In stockOlly olly oxen free! Our obnoxiously fun Happy Birthday You Old F*ck Card features that little asshole Billy shouting his birthday message so you c...
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