Cube Goodies + Office Toys

Who says working at an office has to be totally boring?  Just pack your cubical with cool stuff to allow your inner child some recess time while suffering through the most boring of conference calls!  Or just lighten the mood with some harmless pranks!  Find hilarious cube goodies, office toys, and excellent gifts ideas for co-workers!  You'll be the hit of the water cooler with our awesome cube goodies + office toys!

Pooping At Work Hand Sanitizer

$5.99

So one minute you're looking your colleagues in the eye, working on work stuff.  The next minute you're seperated by mere inches of a bathroom stall with your pants down.  Down!Is the hand dryer at the office just recycling all those fart germs...

Stress Manatee

$7.99

Squishy sea cow = Cheaper than therapy! Under the careful guidance of our professionally trained Stress Manatee, learn how to relax, and go with the flow. Man, have those manatees have got it made. Constantly floating in warm water, not having to care...

I'm Not Bossy. I'm the Boss. Socks

$10.99

Our I'm Not Bossy. I'm the Boss. Socks are totally boss! Whether you're CEO of your home or if you're a force to be reckoned with in the business world, these socks will speak your inner truth and command attention without having to say a word or snap...

Mini Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Guy

$12.99

Look at me! I'm the Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tube Man! Behold - the very first of its kind, our Mini Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Guy! He's the perfect desktop companion, road trip buddy, or hilarious gift! He's a man that goes by many...

Coffee Makes Me Poop Gum

$1.99

Be sure to over share. A cup of coffee and a roll of toilet paper... a perfectly fine way to start the day! Popping a piece of our invigorating Coffee Makes Me Poop Gum is like brewing up a pot of relief!  You may not be irregular around here, so...

Mini Zoltar - He Speaks!

$12.99

Zoltar "Make Your Wish" Our Mini Zoltar - He Speaks! is inspired by the all-knowing animatronic fortune teller, who made it to the Big screen with Tom Hanks in the late 80's! Authentic retro-styled Zoltar machine Crystal ball gives off a blue glow...

Parasite Pals Pencil Toppers

$5.99

Human leeches like your freeloading brother, money mooching friend and emotional vampire gal pal tend to give all parasites a bad rap... but there's a host of charming ones that are down right peachy! Our Parasite Pals Pencil Toppers are tiny parasites...

Ice Cream Cone Phone Stand

$2.99 $2.00

Our Ice Cream Cone Phone Stand is a cone for your phone! Just don't drop it like it's a hot summer day on an undeserving surface! This sweet phone holder is made of ceramic. So this melting, fallen hero of an ice cream cone double scoops as a functional...

Space Invaders Tiny Arcade

$19.99

The 80’s are back! Space Invaders are here and they’re smaller than ever! Use the tiny buttons on our Space Invaders Tiny Arcade to fire at swarms of extraterrestrials to prevent the alien invasion and defend the planet! One of the most...

Desktop Disco Fever Kit

$12.99

Ain't no stopping us now! We've got our Desktop Disco Fever Kit! Lights! Sound! Boogie! Our funkadelic Desktop Disco Fever Kit has everything you need to get down, get down. This groovy kit includes just what you need to set the stage...

Finger Monsters!

$8.99

They're baaaack... Our mischievous Finger Monster! Set is up to their old shenanigans again! The Finger Monsters have been secretly running away from our warehouse! We've heard reports from our customers that they have found them stowing away...

Crystal Growing Coral Reef

$11.99

Are you feeling underwater with all of the work and tasks hanging over your head?  You might as well enjoy the view!     Forge a new world on your desk with our Crystal Growing Coral Reef... it's like snorkeling at your desk!    ...

Office Party Swig Time Stapler Corkscrew

$14.99 $5.00

Our cleverly disguised Office Party Stapler Corkscrew won't leave you screwed over the next time an impromptu, in-house, happy hour breaks out at work! While it may look like a mild-mannered regular ole standard office stapler, its secret identity...

Alpaca Eraser Set

$1.99 $1.00

Our cute Alpaca Eraser Set is as adorable as the real thing without all of that farm smell and the gross spitting.  Get a few sets and start your own alpaca farm with these cutie erasers!   Doing homework or sitting at your desk at work...

Desk Donut Eraser And Pushpin Holder

$9.99

Our mouth watering Desk Donut Eraser + Pin Holder is the stickiest and gooiest eye candy in Cube Town!  This magnificent, pink-frosted, donut eraser that’s “sprinkled” with 50 colorful pins for your corkboard is about to make your...

Little Big Fan USB Desk Fan

$22.99

With our adorablely fan-tastic Little Big Fan USB Desk Fan you  can keep your cool when work gets hot! When things heat up at the office, you’ll always keep your cool with Fred’s Little Big Fan. It's a ridiculously cute shrunk-down...

Shine + Dine Menu Lamp

$7.99

A glowing example of fun and function, our Shine + Dine Menu Lamp is totally lit! It offers a little light, right where you need it. Struggling to read the menu in that dimly-lit restaurant? Reach for Shine + Dine, the adorable miniature table lamp that...

The Screaming Goat Mini Book + Figure

$9.99

Office mascot and spirit animal. For when there are no words, The Screaming Goat Mini Book + Figure speaks your language. The ultimate stress reliever, you can no become the owner of your very own screaming goat! Sh*t just goat serious. Let it goat. Let...

Mini Man Cave Desktop Kit

$8.99

Enter the Testoster-Zone! Oh, yeah! Now every guy can have a tiny space to call his own with the Mini Man Cave Desktop Kit! A place were burping, farting, yelling at TV and housing the world's most ugly but comfortable furniture known to mankind. ...

World's Smallest Perplexus

$9.99

Easy to Play... Hard to Master! We can describe the World's Smallest Perplexus in one word. A-maze-ing. *badum tssh* Perplexus Original now comes in a miniature pocket-sized edition so you can keep playing on the go! This 3D maze has always been a fun...

Reboot Red Wellies Phone Stand

$9.99 $4.00

Keep your phone high & dry with our adorable Reboot Red Wellies Phone Stand! This charming pair of red, rubbery wellies is perfectly designed to cradle your phone and keep it upright for charging or streaming rainy day movies. No need to worry about...

Birds On A Wire Picture Hangers

$11.99

Hey Hal, what's shakin?  Meh, I'm holding some picture of a kid wearing a robot costume with cake all over his face, what about you?  I'm holding a cell phone bill that was due yesterday, but it's nice to see the flock is growing. It's the...

Mini Himalayan Rock Salt Mood Lamp

$12.99

Rainbows Rock! Our adorably Mini Himalayan Rock Salt Mood Lamp is made from real salt and rotates through a rainbow of colors! While standard Himalayan salt lamps glow orange (or pink), this mini-size mood lamp rotates through a full spectrum of colors,...

This Meeting Is Bullsh*t Men's Socks

$12.99

Socks For Sucky Meetings At Work Statistically speaking, and according to this colorful PowerPoint pie chart based on what's trending, we'd guesstimate that 90% of meetings match the criteria for wearing our amazingly accurate This Meeting Is Bullshit...

Magic Slime Reusable Keyboard Cleaner

$7.99 $4.00

What do Peter Venkman and your keyboard have in common? They've both been slimed! Or will be soon. But that is where this particular parallel universe ends.  For it is not made from ectoplasm, and instead of ghost busting, you'll be germ busting...

Magic Poo

$3.99

#1 Poopy Stocking Stuffer! If you're always looking for sh*t to play with our Magic Poo is the one for you! This crap is magic! Well, kinda sorta, anyway.  Use this frighteningly realistic poo to play pranks, relieve stress, and entertain your inner...

The Daily Mood Flipchart

$8.99

Some days the office is like a tea party, other days it's a lion's den. That's why The Daily Mood is a crucial desktop accessory! This fun flip-chart spells out everyone's demeanor in no uncertain terms. There are 47 moods to choose from, each with its...

This Meeting Is Bullsh*t Jumbo Pouch

$9.99

Our This Meeting is Bullsh*t Jumbo Pouch is the perfect way to tote all the bullshit papers that you have to print for your bullshit meeting. Adorned with colorful language and an awesome geometric design - which btw perfectly matches our This Meeting is...

Flamingo Tropic Tacks Pushpins

$7.99

Get a leg up on organization with our Flamingo Tropic Tacks Pushpins! A flamboyance of flamingos has taken over your corkboard, wading to get your notes organized! Fred's Tropic Tacks are standing tall on useful pushpin "legs" to hold down bills,...

Build Your Own Stonehenge Mega Mini Kit

$8.99

Classic Rock that stood the test of time. Our rockin' Build Your Own Stonehenge Mega Mini Kit is a puzzle and miniature model all in one! Now you can explore and replicate the magic of this extraordinary perplexing prehistoric monument right at your...

Handicorn Unicorn Hand Puppet

$6.99

A Handy Gift for Unicorn Lovers! Excuse me sir, I must tell you that your hand is extraordinary! Yawn.  Look at your boring old hand!  It's so practical with its opposable digit and prehensile-ness, but it lacks a certain… MAGIC!...

Finger Log Rolling

$9.99

Time to log off, and log on! Desperate for adventure while stuck at your desk? It's time you take our Finger Log Rolling for a spin! Perfect gift for hipsters looking for a retro game to jump into! Their flannels will perfectly match the aesthetic...

Fartzooka Fart Machine

$11.99

Farts Are Funny!Have a gas with our super cheeky Fartzooka!   Highly addictive, like your Aunt Meg's bean and cheesy nacho dip, you won't want to put it down!   Just pull back, grip and let 'er rip! You can fine tune your instrument with the...

Retro Mixtape Jumbo Pouch

$9.99

With our Retro Mixtape Jumbo Pouch, getting wound up about losing stuff in your giant bag is a thing of past! If you're a child of the 70's or 80's you'll know that mixtapes were life. They were essential in capturing your fav songs off the radio, making...

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer

$5.99

Attention all Congressmen, Senators, heads of production companies...  Where you put your hands is none of our business, unless it is on someone else!  We've become quite concerned when you involve other people, though.   Handshakes,...

Flamingo Flexmark Bookmark

$6.99

Our pretty in pink Fred and Friends Flamingo Flexmark Bookmark is perfect for keeping your place when you go take a dip in the pool! Because sometimes you need to take a break from your book and stretch your legs... err.. leg. This stretchy silicone...

My Job Gives Me Diarrhea Hand Sanitizer

$5.99

We sh*t you not! Our My Job Gives Me Diarrhea Hand Sanitizer is an actual product. It's a combination of our #1 and #2 top office gifts! The truth is, my job doesn't actually give me diarrhea. But it HAS taught me how to spell diarrhea, which is a pretty...

Uncanny Mandarin Orange Erasers

$9.99

Orange you glad you stumbled upon these erasers?  Ex-squeeze us, but we must introduce you to our Uncanny Mandarin Orange Erasers! Their orange-inality is sure to a-peel to your sense of humor! Fashioned to look like whole segments of a mandarin...

Desktop Terrarium Kit

$9.99

No Green Thumb Required Plant killer? You'll love our Desktop Terrarium Kit, that's faux sure! We saw your picture hanging on the wall of our local garden shop. You try your best to keep plants alive, but it's just not your thing.  So now you...

Uncanny Cocktail Wiener Erasers

$9.99 $4.00

Oh, don't be such a weenie! Of course, our Uncanny Cocktail Wiener Erasers are the perfect departure gift from a less than admirable ex-boyfriend! Particularly after you discovered he was just a pig in a blanket. I mean, there are wurst things you...

Get Along With Your Co-Workers Gum

$1.99

Your Job Doesn't Suck, Just Your Co-WorkersThe reality in the majority of people's lives is that they have to get a job to survive. Unfortunately you get stuck working alongside people you might not otherwise frequent in the free world! To make your...

Inflatable Unicorn Horn

$7.99 $3.00

Be Yourself, Unless You Can Be A Unicorn Someone asks you a question but you cant say anything your inner-unicorn is screaming to come out at the most inopportune times.   What are you supposed to do?   The next time you hear that mystical...

Novel Idea Fortune Cookie Bookmarks

$7.99

Confucius say that our Novel Idea Fortune Cookie Bookmarks are a couple of smart cookies! Just like the real thing, these miniature silicone cookies dole out some big nuggets of wisdom printed on fabric ribbon fortunes: The best chapter is yet to come...

Just Texting On The Toilet Real Quick Hand Sanitizer

$5.99

Calm down, everybody does it.  You just gotta be smart about it.  Do everything in the right order and don't let things touch other things.  Then apply our Just Texting On The Toilet Real Quick Hand Sanitizer.Texting in the bathroom allows...

Smitten Kitten Measuring Tape

$6.99

Unlike most every other kitty on the planet, our Smitten Kitten Measuring Tape is actually encouraging you to pull her tail.  No, it's not a trap! You can trust! Promise. We're totally not kitten. It's paws down just the cutest tape measure...

Desktop Ping Pong

$7.99

It’s on like Ping Pong. Unleash your inner Forest Gump with our Desktop Ping Pong! Lovers of table tennis can now take their favorite sport with them wherever they go! This newest addition to collection of desktop sports mini kits contains all...

Sloths On A Vine Hangers

$11.99

Too lazy to even bother?   These sweet sloths will keep your photos and notes hanging around in the chillest of ways possible. Everyone's favorite slo-mo mammal is ready to nonchalantly hang on to your precious photos, valuable coupons, and game...

Stress Buster Desktop Punching Bag

$19.99

Give It The Old One-Two! Sometimes we all just have one of those days and Calgon just can't take you away.   Call it a bad day or maybe call it a regular day, but in the end you need to relieve some stress! So stick our Stress Buster on your desk...

F*ck This Sh*t Men's Socks

$12.99

Not What I Want To Be Doing Right Now Socks We know, we know... why would a classy, well-dressed lumberjack such as this fella use that ugly, undignified word?  Because sometimes you just need a "Fuck," that's why. Our ruggedly handsome Fuck This...

Do I Look Like A Team Player Men's Socks

$12.99

There Isn't An "I" In This Team Chances are, if they can read your hilarious Do I Look Like A Team Player? Men's Crew Socks, as your crossed ankles are exposed while your feet are propped up on your desk, you're offering them up a firm but obvious......

Pom Pins Pomegranate Pushpins

$9.99

We don't want to be pushy, but our Pom Pins Pomegranate Pushpins are more than just a fun + healthy alternative to boring run-of-the-mill tacks. They're the homeopathic cure for a bland desktop! Each one of the “seeds” in this pomegranate...

Pumped Up High Heel Magnets

$7.99

Stick a stiletto on it with our Pumped Up High Heel Magnets! That's right, these sassy red high heels are happy to tell you exactly where you can stick it! Whether it's  in your fridge, locker, or the metal plate in your ex-boyfriends head. (We have...

Ramen Doodles Eraser + Sharpener Set

$7.99

Our deliciously fun Ramen Doodles Eraser + Sharpener Set by Fred is so cute we could just slurp it on up! If you're noodling around for an idea for a gift idea for a college student, and udon know what to get, look no further! It's also a ramen-tic gift...

Yard Goods Tire Planter

$11.99

Are you “tired” of typical planters? Ready for a “change”? Pop a plant into our tirelessly cool Yard Goods Tire Planter! It’s classic roadside Americana sized down for succulents, air plants and even herbs! Pile on the charm...

Rainbow + Rainy Day Clouds Bookmarks

$7.99

Our Novel Idea Rainbow + Rainy Day Clouds Bookmarks by Fred are literally, figuratively, and hyperbole too cute for words! These awesomely designed bookmarks will remind you there's always a perfect opportunity to catch up on your reading!...

This Meeting Is Bullsh*t Woman's Socks

$10.99

Should Have Called In Sick For Work SocksOur classy yet sassy This Meeting Is Bullshit Socks are perfect for flashing a little ankle at the next pointless meeting. Because we can damn well guaranteed you'd rather be lounging on the couch with a bowl of...

I Need More Money And Power And Less Sh*t From You People Gum

$1.99

Smile and nod.  Smile and nod.  Make sure to wear your mouth guard at night, so you don't grind your teeth down to nubs. You may not be able to lighten the workload at the office, but you sure can lighten the mood with our I Need More Money and...

Pumped Up Red High Heel Pushpins

$7.99 $4.00

Stick a stiletto in it with our Pumped Up Red High Heel Pushpins! Take the first steps to organization with Pumped Up Pushpins! Each little red stiletto is a handy pushpin ready to tiptoe across your tickets and other pinnable ephemera. They make your...

Desktop Shuffleboard Game

$9.99

Everyday I'm shufflin' Slide and bump your boredom away with our Desktop Shuffleboard Game! There's no reason to wait for retirement, or happy hour, when you have this awesome desktop distraction close at hand. Play one-on-one or as a team to block,...

Ringmaster Of The Sh*tshow Pencil Case

$5.99

With our amazingly accurate Ringmaster of the Shitshow Pencil Case, you can proudly flash your cringe worthy credentials at the drop of an exasperated *sigh*! You're ringing it, you're slinging it, you're bringing it. And now you've got the bag to match!...