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Morning Sucks Soap

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Close those freakin' shades! I'm being blinded by the freakin' sun! And where the hell's my coffee? You call this coffee???

Our original Morning Sucks Soap is made with extra fancy, pure vegetable base Cyprus and orange peel. It's the ultimate little luxury gift for anyone who bathes, gets dirty or just wishes to smell fabulous.

Our Morning Sucks Soap weighs 5.5 ounces. Rub some of this on your crabby ass.

Shipping + 60 Day Returns

60 Returns Policy
You may return most new, unopened items within 60 days of placing your order for a full refund. We'll also pay the return shipping costs if the return is a result of our error (you received an incorrect or defective item, etc.).

* A few items have an exception to our 60 Day Return Policy, and that will be noted on the product page and in your cart before you checkout.

Please visit our full 60 Day Return Policy for more information.

We currently ship to the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom. Note that there are restrictions on some products, and some products cannot be shipped to international destinations.

Before you place you order, we will estimate shipping methods, costs, and delivery dates for you based on your items and the shipping options you select. Depending on the shipping method or promotion you choose, delivery date estimates will appear in your cart and before you complete checkout.

Please visit Shipping Rates + Transit Times for more information.