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Gosh Darnit! Anti Profanity Candle

in stock, ready to be shipped
Original price $23.99 - Original price $23.99
Original price
$23.99 - $23.99
Current price $23.99
Shipping FAQ's

Contiguous US: Free Shipping on orders over $75. $4.99 on orders under $75. Average transit time of 4 business days. Rush shipping options are also available.

Alaska + Hawaii: Flat rate for all you can ship $23.99. Average transit time of 3 business days.

International: We ship to most countries. Shipping fee is based on weight and dimensions of order. Transit times vary based on your country's customs processing times.

Processing time: All orders ship from our warehouse in Virginia within one business day.


Free Shipping

We offer free shipping on qualified orders over $75 after any coupons have been applied and shipping within the contiguous United States. Orders under $75 ship to the contiguous United States for $4.99 (more information)

Time To Ship

Orders ship within 1 business day from our warehouse in Virginia. Delivery days are shown during checkout. We offer standard and rush delivery methods.

APO + FPO Addresses

We ship to APO and FPO addresses via the USPS and include the required customs forms. Free shipping is not available.

Alaska + Hawaii

We offer a flat rate of $23.99 for all you can ship to Alaska and Hawaii.

International Shipping

Shipping charges are based on your delivery location and order weight/dimensions. You will be shown the cost and approximate delivery date during checkout.

60 Day Returns

Customer satisfaction is extremely important to us!

If you are not completely satisfied with your order, you may return your purchse with 60 days of receiving your order. (view full return policy)

Payment Methods + Secure Checkout

No need to re-enter your information! Check out quickly and safely with Apple Pay, Paypal, Amazon Pay, Meta, G Pay or Shop payment or your prefered credit card.

Doggone it! What the flipping heck!

Our Gosh Darnit Anti-Profanity Candle is so frickin' cute that it may make us want to give up cursing for good! And that's saying a helluva lot!

The day has come. You once identified with the mischievous and carefree Dennis the Menace, but seemingly overnight, you've morphed into the cranky next-door neighbor, Mr. Wilson. Seeing things from his side of the hill, or errrr... fence, certainly changes your perspective!

  • Gosh Darnit! Anti-Profanity Candle
  • Silent Spring Scent (Freshly Cut Grass)
  • Iconic steel paint can, containing 12 ounces of high-quality soy wax 
  • Dressed in a quirky mid-century-styled label that reads "NEW & IMPROVED Gosh Darnit STAY OFF MY LAWN, YOU DANG KIDS I just sprayed the roundup."
  • This can-dle has a burn time of approximately 50+ hours.
  • Hand-poured in the USA!

Silent Spring Scent, aka Freshly Cut Grass. Premium soy wax, hand-poured by the fun-loving Whiskey River residing in Newark, Ohio, USA. This darn fine-looking steel paint bucket holds 12 oz and measures approximately 4 inches tall x 3.25 inches in diameter. Darn-tootin' our Gosh Darnit! Anti-Profanity Candle is a damn good way to troll your suburban-living, filthy-mouthed best friend.


Perpetual Kid Reviews from Google