Grumpy Old Man Gum
SAVE 20% OFF YOUR ORDER TODAY!
Enter coupon code USA on your order of $40+ (before shipping)
📦 Free Shipping + Transit Times
Contiguous US: Free Shipping on orders over $49. $4.99 on orders under $49. Average transit time of 4 business days. Rush shipping options are also available.
Alaska + Hawaii: Flat rate for all you can ship $23.99. Average transit time of 3 business days.
International: We ship to most countries. Shipping fee is based on weight and dimensions of order. Transit times vary based on your country's customs processing times.
Processing time: All orders ship from our warehouse in Virginia within one business day.
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Free Shipping
We offer free shipping on qualified orders over $49 after any coupons have been applied and shipping within the contiguous United States. Orders under $49 ship to the contiguous United States for $4.99 (more information)
Time To Ship
Orders ship within 1 business day from our warehouse in Virginia. Delivery days are shown during checkout. We offer standard and rush delivery methods.
APO + FPO Addresses
We ship to APO and FPO addresses via the USPS and include the required customs forms. Free shipping is not available.
Alaska + Hawaii
We offer a flat rate of $23.99 for all you can ship to Alaska and Hawaii.
International Shipping
Shipping charges are based on your delivery location and order weight/dimensions. You will be shown the cost and approximate delivery date during checkout.
❤️ 60 Day Returns - Love it or return it!
Customer satisfaction is extremely important to us!
If you are not completely satisfied with your order, you may return your purchse with 60 days of receiving your order. (view full return policy)
For crotchety gentleman, young and old
Cool down that hot-tempered, complaint-filled mouth with our minty Grumpy Old Man Gum! The fun checker board design reminds us that the distance been checkered Vans to Viagra is shorter than you think fellas. In the blink of a commercial break disco nap... you morph from the noisy neighbor, to the nosey neighbor. Turn that music down! Get off my yard!
You don't need to be of boomer status to be considered a grumpy old man anymore. TBH, some of the grumpiest old men we've met are in their 20's. You know it's true. Back of gum box spews some grumpy statements:
- When I was a kid, I got gum once a year. For my birthday. If I was lucky.
- This gum is too minty.
- 8 pieces? Back in the day, gum came with 9 pieces.
- Mint? An old man can't enjoy some nice bubble gum anymore?
- No one appreciates a good piece of gum anymore.
- People younger than me are stupid.
- This gum was overpriced.
- 8 pieces? Gee, hope I don't spoil my dinner.
- Somebody find this gum in the trash or what?
- They don't even want you to chew gum anymore. Say it stresses your jaw or something. Please.
- No one listens to me.
A fun + tasty prank gift to call out the giant ray of sunshine in your life. Birthday, anniversary, valentine's day, or just a humorously passive aggressive hint.
Made in Canada. 8 pieces of candy-coated, mint-flavored gum in each box. Mint: Sugar, Dextrose, Gum Base, Corn Syrup, Natural and Artificial Flavors, Tapioca Dextrin, Glycerine, Gum Arabic, Aspartame, Acesulfame Potassium, Titanium Dioxide, Confectioners Glaze, Carnauba Wax, Corn Starch, BHT (to maintain freshness). Each dainty pack of gum measures 2.75 inches long x 1.25 inches tall. We can't promise that our Grumpy Old Man Gum will not stick to your dentures.
