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Happy Birthday You Old F*ck Card

Out of stock
Sold out
Original price $5.49 - Original price $5.49
Original price
$5.49 - $5.49
Current price $5.49

Take 10% OFF your order with coupon HAPPY2023

Free Shipping + Transit Times

Contiguous US: Free Shipping on orders over $49. $4.99 on orders under $49. Average transit time of 4 business days. Rush shipping options are also available.

Alaska + Hawaii: Flat rate for all you can ship $23.99. Average transit time of 3 business days.

International: We ship to most countries. Shipping fee is based on weight and dimensions of order. Transit times vary based on your country's customs processing times.

Processing time: All orders ship from our warehouse in Virginia within one business day.


Free Shipping

We offer free shipping on qualified orders over $49 after any coupons have been applied and shipping within the contiguous United States. Orders under $49 ship to the contiguous United States for $4.99 (more information)

Time To Ship

Orders ship within 1 business day from our warehouse in Virginia. Delivery days are shown during checkout. We offer standard and rush delivery methods.

APO + FPO Addresses

We ship to APO and FPO addresses via the USPS and include the required customs forms. Free shipping is not available.

Alaska + Hawaii

We offer a flat rate of $23.99 for all you can ship to Alaska and Hawaii.

International Shipping

Shipping charges are based on your delivery location and order weight/dimensions. You will be shown the cost and approximate delivery date during checkout.

60 Day Returns

Customer satisfaction is extremely important to us!

If you are not completely satisfied with your order, you may return your purchse with 60 days of receiving your order. (view full return policy)

Payment Methods + Secure Checkout

No need to re-enter your information! Check out quickly and safely with Apple Pay, Paypal, Amazon Pay, Meta, G Pay or Shop payment or your prefered credit card.

Olly olly oxen free!

Our obnoxiously fun Happy Birthday You Old F*ck Card features that little asshole Billy shouting his birthday message so you can hear it on the other side of the hill you just climbed over! Or maybe, he’s just trying to make sure you an hear him at all, since you’re too proud to use a Miracle Ear.

  • Front: Happy Birthday You Old Fuck!
  • Inside: Blank for your personal message

Wearing a striped-sweater tucked into his jeans, this kid is looking for a further ass-beating by unleashing an Old Yeller type of holler to alert your friends, townsfolk, and livestock to you being an old fuck.

  • Printed on premium creme colored paper, coupled with a shimmery copper metallic envelope
  • It's eco-friendly bitches! Locally 4-color offset printed with soy based inks
  • Fun, irreverent, retro-design
  • Made in the USA!

Brightly colored in pink and orange. Card measures approximately 4.25 inches wide x 5.5 inches tall. Made in the United States by a woman-owned company. This card was created by artist, designer, and owner Olga Krigman. Our Happy Birthday You Old F*ck Card is a fun way to kid around with your aging contemporaries, and fellow old farts.

Perpetual Kid Reviews from Google