Holy Crap! You're Old! But Hey, You're Still Alive Birthday Card
Contiguous US: Free Shipping on orders over $75. $4.99 on orders under $75. Average transit time of 4 business days. Rush shipping options are also available.
Alaska + Hawaii: Flat rate for all you can ship $23.99. Average transit time of 3 business days.
International: We ship to most countries. Shipping fee is based on weight and dimensions of order. Transit times vary based on your country's customs processing times.
Processing time: All orders ship from our warehouse in Virginia within one business day.
We offer free shipping on qualified orders over $75 after any coupons have been applied and shipping within the contiguous United States. Orders under $75 ship to the contiguous United States for $4.99 (more information)
Time To Ship
APO + FPO Addresses
We ship to APO and FPO addresses via the USPS and include the required customs forms. Free shipping is not available.
Alaska + Hawaii
We offer a flat rate of $23.99 for all you can ship to Alaska and Hawaii.
Shipping charges are based on your delivery location and order weight/dimensions. You will be shown the cost and approximate delivery date during checkout.
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If you are not completely satisfied with your order, you may return your purchse with 60 days of receiving your order. (view full return policy)
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Send them rolling over the hill in laughter (just careful they don't break a hip!)
While they may be accustomed to Next-Day Pony Express, our farm-fresh Holy Crap! You're Old! Birthday Card, can be sent the old (but not that old) fashioned way.
- Holy Crap! You're Old! Birthday Card
- Front: Features a vintage photo of an old man sizing you up, wearing denim overalls with a button-down shirt, and his hands positioned on his hips exclaiming, "Holy Crap! You're Old! But Hey... You're Still Alive! Happy Birthday!
- Inside of Card: Blank for a personalized message. Printed on quality paper as they did in the olden days.
- Paired with some kinda highfalutin shimmery copper envelope
- Forest friendly and printed with vibrant soy-based inks
- Made in the USA!
Includes one A2 size folded card, printed on premium 100lb paper. Measures 4.25 inches wide x 5.5 inches tall. Don't laugh too hard, for our Holy Crap You're Old Birthday Card is coming for you next!