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Tin Foil Hat

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Original price $9.99 - Original price $9.99
Original price
$9.99
$9.99 - $9.99
Current price $9.99

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Free Shipping on $49 + Transit Times

Contiguous US: Free Shipping on orders over $49. $4.99 on orders under $49. Average transit time of 4 business days. Rush shipping options are also available.

Processing time: All orders ship from our warehouse in Virginia within one business day.

Alaska + Hawaii: Flat rate for all you can ship $23.99. Average transit time of 3 business days.

International: We ship to most countries. Shipping fee is based on weight and dimensions of order. Transit times vary based on your country's customs processing times.

60 Day Returns - Love it or return it!

Customer satisfaction is extremely important to us!

If you are not completely satisfied with your order, you may return your purchse with 60 days of receiving your order. (view full return policy)

Flat-earthers and conspiracy theorists unite!

As any "woke" person knows, a Tin Foil Hat is a necessity of modern life. However, one of the most irritating parts of being under constant, long-distance electronic thought observations is having to make a new tin foil hat every day!

Fear not! (except for everything else you should be afraid of) This mylar hat fits most adult heads and comes with a felt lining and an elastic strap to hold it in place. You’ll look stylish under the harshest psychic attacks that “they” can throw at you!

  • Reflective “tin foil” hat
  • Protects against “them” doing “that thing”
  • Reusable + Comfy!
  • Also available for cats!

This thoughtfully designed hat offers protection against mental and psychotronic attacks from both government agents and alien intruders. THEY have been targeting you for years. Don't let being a "Targeted Individual" limit your life. Wear this hat as you go to the grocery store, a football game, or even the DMV and they won't be able to read your thoughts or modify your behavior.

Archie McPhee's unique cutting-edge design blocks all electromagnetic fields and reduces HARRP and gamma rays by 70%. Includes a soft felt lining for the ultimate comfort needed for 24 hours of use!

When we wore it to the grocery store, we noticed 20% less mind control and lots of jealous stares! Works against aliens, government plots, men in black, giant ape cultists, the electric company, the circus clown collective, cyber-narcissists, grumpy psychics, nosy neighbors, plotting mother-in-laws, and more!

Contains one tin foil hat. One size fits most. Made of mylar, felt, and elastic. Makes you look like a totally sane person with a Hershey Kiss on their head! Our Tin Foil Hat is the perfect gift for conspiracy theorists!