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Soaps + Sprays

You know what really stinks?  Not being able to find the perfect gift!  Clean up your act with our awesome collection of soap and sprays!  With witty gift soaps, silly hand sanitizers, and magical breath sprays we're sure you'll find something brilliant to freshen up your shopping list!

Master Crapsman Poo- Pourri Gift Set

$19.99

It’s Poo hunting season! The perfect gift for the handyman in your life, Master Crapsman Gift Set comes with both Trap-A-Crap and Royal Flush scents. Maybe it's one bottle for the basement aka man cave and another for our in the garage? Whatever...

Narcissist Soap

$5.99

This soap is all about you... You have to have this Narcissist Soap because it is all about you. You are the cleanest person ever. Nobody is cleaner than you are. This is the soap for the person who is just the best. Helps you clean all the germs, other...

Pocket Sized Sweet Violet Poo-Pourri

$4.99

Berries are black, violets are blue, honey smells sweet when you poo! You can leave a little sparkle wherever you GO with just a small spritz of Sweet Violet Poo-Pourri! The blend of Blackberry, Violet and Honey natural essential oils eliminate odor...

Saint Dr. Fauci Hand Sanitizer

$12.99

Saint Fauci says stay clean, stay safe! Our special quarantine edition Saint Dr. Fauci Hand Sanitizer is perfect for staying clean at home. Well, now he's saying you can take it out with you. Wait, you can take it out if it maintains a six foot distance...

Soap For Cat People

$8.99

Smells Like Purring Our a-meow-zing Soap for Cat People is a fun and purr-fect gift for the person in your life that loves cats! It's scented like warm milk which no cat or cat lover can resist. Having more than three cats isn't crazy. They may leave...

Soap for Dad Bods

$9.99

Smells like cookies & cable sports Our Soap for Dad Bods helps build unwavering confidence and smells like toasted marshmallow. Mmmmm... marshmallows. And now there's no reason to feel guilty for indulging. Thanks to an incredible new development in...

Soap for Karma

$9.99

Scented with Ha-ha-ha-ha. Sorry not sorry. Our Soap for Karma is a perfect gift for those who Know-What-They-Did. What goes around... comes around, we hope. We're not necessarily talking about tricky STDs here, although, y'know, you reap what you sow...

That Was Outstanding Lavatory Mist

$11.99

You did it! And well! REALLY well! How do you feel? Amazing? And... um... lighter? Nothing like a little self affirmation with our That Was Outstanding Lavatory Mist! Just two quick mists will cure the air of any poop foulness. Smells great Funny...

Uranium Glow In The Dark Soap

$7.99

Get your glow back! Has your morning glow been missing lately? Radioactivate your day in the most environmentally friendly, organic way! When you use our Uranium Bar of Glow In The Dark Soap, you will be in your element every day. Be careful not to...

I Just Sh*t In The Woods Hand Sanitizer

$6.99

Watch your step! The worst thing about camping or hiking is that sudden urge to drop a deuce.   So next time you poop in the woods, have our I Just Shit in The Woods Hand Sanitizer available for your cleaning and sanitizing needs.   Let's...

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer

$6.99

You know someone that needs this! Attention all Congressmen, Senators, heads of production companies...  Where you put your hands is none of our business, unless it is on someone else!  We've become quite concerned when you involve other...

Soap for a Midlife Crisis

$9.99

Will not fade new tattoos! Our Soap for a Midlife Crisis smells like a motorcycle, or a perm or maybe even a food truck. Whatever it is, you're throwing caution to the wind and finally going for it. And not a second too soon. Your chances of getting hit...

Soap for Bromance

$9.99

Frisbee golf date? This brotastic bar of Bromance Soap smells like someone has a new friend. I used to consider you a lone wolf, but that's all in the past now. Yeah, I saw you buying that growler of Belgian dark ale for your new beer-whispering bestie...

Soap for Stoners

$9.99

Puff, puff, pass the soap! Our Soap for Stoners smells like Colorado and might antagonize the DEA when you lather up real well. It's a great bar of soap for your sink or bath where it can be 4:20 whenever you want. Stoners Soap is a great gift for weed...

Soap for the Middle Child

$9.99

Who are you again? Our Soap for the Middle Child is for all the forgotten kids out there that got lost in the mix. The oldest always got the love and the youngest got all the attention. We'll just go ahead and dye our hair purple. No one will notice...

The Joy of Bathing with Bob Ross Soap

$3.49

Bob Ross Wet-on-Wet Technique Reach for The Joy of Bathing with Bob Ross Soap whenever you’re feeling a little Prussian Blue!   Make some happy little clouds of foam! This vegetable soap is made with glycerin, shea butter, and cocoa...

Damn Dude! Lavatory Mist

$11.99

Because lighting a match around all of that gas doesn't seem like a good idea. Our Damn Dude! Lavatory Mist is made with fragrant essential oils to avoid cheap perfume fog and butt smog. Two quick squirts in the toilet before you squat and that Taco Bell...

Feel Incredibly High Instantly Breath Spray

$4.99

Introducing our Feel Incredibly High Instantly Breath Spray... Liquid Marijuana*.  Your very own Buzz in a Bottle! Catch the perfect buzz without catching the heat!  Get high at work, in class, even at the pool! So discreet you can use it...

Mister Rogers Soap

$3.99

Feel Mister Rogers clean! Mister Rogers' Soap says: "Your sink is special!" Wash your hands before puppets! Wash your hands after feeding the fish! You can never go down the drain when you cleanse yourself with Mister Rogers' Soap. It gives you such a...

Sh*tting Glitter Magical Unicorn Lavatory Mist

$11.99

You're not seeing things, our Shitting Glitter Magical Unicorn Lavatory Mist actually does exist! And this shit is magic! Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy. But unicorns? They eat glitter. And, we don't think we need to tell you...

This Sh*t Is Bananas Lavatory Mist

$11.99

B-a-n-a-n-a-s! You know things have gone crazy when people are using our This Shit is Bananas Lavatory Mist after a long bathroom visit! Toss one in your purse or leave one in the bathroom, with over 500 applications in each bottle, they're great! How...

Total Eclipse Of The Fart Lavatory Mist

$11.99

A fresh remix of an old favorite, our Total Eclipse Of The Fart Lavatory Mist by Blue Q is on track to be a hit in the bathroom! You need this now, tonight.  You need this more than ever. (Especially if it's Taco Tuesday.) Whether you farted or...

Walkin' Around With Poop in My Hand Hand Sanitizer

$6.99

Live your life! With poop in your hand! Our Walkin' Around With Poop in My Hand Hand Sanitizer is perfect for dog owners that pick up the poop and carry it around the neighborhood. Maybe they'll stop and have a conversation with someone while they...

Who Let The Logs Out Lavatory Mist

$11.99

Who? Who? Who? Seriously though, WHO is responsible for our Who Let The Logs Out Lavatory Mist? Baha Men, we're looking at you. Scented with citrus and mint, and a hint of green moss, you can almost forget that it's sole purpose in life is to shield your...

Would Definitely Sh*t Here Again Lavatory Mist

$11.99

A cheeky gift for your favorite afi-shit-ionado our Would Definitely Shit Here Again Lavatory Mist will alert visitors to your impressive bathroom rating, and provide them with some reading material while they take a load off! Or is it pinch a loaf off?...

Fresh Cut Grass Poo-Pourri

$9.99

The smell of kicking some grass! The perfect gift for that special guy, the Fresh Cut Grass Poo-Pourri let's him enjoy the bathroom visit with the lively scents of the great outdoors. This spray cuts bathroom odor short with Bergamot, Eucalyptus and Hay...

Vladimir Pootin Lavatory Mist

$11.99

Russion Collusion To Cover Up For Your Poop No matter how strenuous the investigation is against you taking a poop in public, with our Vladimir Pootin Lavatory Mist your sh*t will come out smelling like flowers - jasmine to be exact! Why? Because a...

Wash Away Useless Meetings Hand Soap

$11.99

Just read the damn email! Rid yourself of those ineffective and mundane assemblies with our Wash Away Useless Meetings Hand Soap. Can it be done? Can these useless meetings actually be washed away? I mean, until people start actually reading the emails,...

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