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Valentine's Day Gifts

Valentine's Day Sale

Cute Little F*ckers Woodland Creature Dish Towel

$10.99

I Love Cooking For Those Cute Little Fuckers! Our Cute Little F*ckers Woodland Creature Dish Towel is like the center of a Venn diagram, in which the big circles are Norman Rockwell and Kinda Fucked Up. It's where your idyllic childhood and adulthood...

Drunk Dialing At Four AM Greeting Card

$4.99

But I looooove you! If I didn't drink then how would you know I love you at four AM? Oh boy! Thank goodness this greeting card exists... How else would you play off one of your girlfriends telling you about their drunkin' call to an ex or even a new...

Hatch and Grow Sloth

$4.99

Just add water – and hang around!  Our Hatch and Grow Sloth doesn't need any food or special care. Just add water and watch him grow and break out of his tree stump.  So, how does it work? Sit back, and relax. This little fella...

I Never Fart Socks

$10.99

I never fart, but I do lie.  Pick up a pair of our I Never Fart Women's Crew Socks for that friend that somehow manages to hold it all in until she gets home. We all know that one person that always seems to have their shit together and they never...

Official World's Smallest Lite-Brite

$7.99

Honey, I Shrunk the Lite-Brite! Our Hasbro licensed, World's Smallest Lite-Brite is just like the one you had in the 70's and 80's - just a lot smaller! And YES! It actually works! You will love create tiny pictures on the smallest Lite Brite you have...

President Of Local Gas Company Men's Socks

$12.99

It's hard to believe it all started in the mailroom. Some guys just have that special "something" that makes them a good fit for our President of the Local Gas Company Men's Crew Socks. Maybe it's the meal planning? Maybe it's the finger pulling? Some...

Purrfect Nails Cat Belly Nail File

$6.99

Hello purr-fect nails! Give your feline friend a good scratch while taking care of your lady claws with our Purrfect Nails Cat Belly Nail File! In the natural setting of your family room, house panthers are known to trick you into thinking they want a...

Giant Ice Cream Cone Lamp

$79.99

Just 150,000 Calories! There are just few things in life that are as enjoyable as an ice cream cone!  What better way can you think of to brighten up the mood in your home or office than with a Giant Ice Cream Cone lamp!  Marvel your guests as...

Global Wishes Dandelion Necklace

$12.99

Best wishes! Dandelions are proof that perception is the key to happiness.  Where some may see a lawn full of weeds, the lucky ones see a field full of wishes! While counting your blessings and being grateful is wonderful, being given the...

Rainbow Puke Lollipop

$4.99 $3.99

Time to throw on your galoshes! Our Rainbow Puke Lollipop is so fantastic it has the entire Perpetual Kid staff literally puking rainbows! This lovable abomination of nature looks like a rainbow threw up all over our unsuspecting lollipop, and...

The Ridiculously Rude Plants Mug

$17.99

Excuse me, have you snipped your Shaggy Soldier? Our Ridiculously Rude Plants Mug features a fun collection of seemingly innocent plants that all have ridiculously rude names. This is the perfect mug for any gardener who would get a chuckle over a...

World's Smallest Glo Worm

$6.99

Glo Worm is still glowing after all these years! Lay your head on your pillow and start counting sheep with the World’s Smallest Glo Worm by your side. The iconic favorite cuddle bug of the 80's is back in a big but smallest way. Glo Worm is ready...

Zen Garden Litter Box

$9.99

That was Zen. This is Meow. Zen meets cats -  and kitty litter - in our calming Zen Garden Litter Box kit that includes everything you need to reach ultimate enlightenment! We give you purr-mission to litter your desk with another stress...

Always Be A Unicorn Socks

$10.99

Introducing our Always Be A Unicorn Socks! Also know as Always Be Yourself Unless You Can Be A Unicorn Then Always Be A Unicorn Socks! We're not going to say that it wasn't a struggle to fit all those words on a sock, but we're also not going to say...

Official World's Smallest Care Bear

$6.99

Classic fun with a retro gift! Our bright World's Smallest Care Bears are your favorite group of colorful and caring bears that just got a lot smaller! Spread some love or beat the bluest of blues with Cheer Bear, Funshine Bear, Share Bear and Grumpy...

Sew Sweet Watermelon Face Mask

$12.99

Oh, my, gourd, Becky. Look at her mask! Our bright and cheerful Sew Sweet Watermelon Face Mask is fresh on the market, and sure to be the talk of the town. Life's a freaking picnic alright! Covid-19 is like the uninvited guest at said picnic... but...

CBD Gummy Bear Party Pack 3000mg

$119.99

Keep Calm and Munch On Yummy CBD Gummies Introducing our mega-huge CBD Gummy Bear Party Pack 3000mg!  Personally, we eat our CBD gummy bears two at at time. So they don't have to die alone.  We're thoughtful like that. CBD...

Mini Zoltar - He Speaks!

$12.99

Zoltar "Make Your Wish" Our Mini Zoltar - He Speaks! is inspired by the all-knowing animatronic fortune teller, who made it to the Big screen with Tom Hanks in the late 80's! Authentic retro-styled Zoltar machine Crystal ball gives off a blue...

People I Love: Cats. Dish Towel

$10.99

Far superior to paypurrr products. Our hiss-terical People I Love: Cats. Dish Towel just barely scratches the surface of ones pre-fur-ence for cats over humans. Purrrhaps you're looking for a gift for your crazy cat lady friend? or maybe you just...

CBD Gummy Bears

$24.99

Oh, I'm a CBD Gummy Bear.... a CBD Gummy Bear.  I'm a yummy, edible, social anxiety reducing gummy bear! What a long strange trip it's been getting CBD Gummy Bears to the market, but we're so Grateful they've finally made it! Now that they're...

Frida Kahlo's On The Lips Of Dreams Lip Balm

$4.99

Cool and soothing no matter how hot your temper! Smooth on Frida Kahlo's On the Lips of Dreams Lip Balm and paint your self-portrait with orange, lemon, and lime flavor. A lip balm in its own right Surreal citrus flavor Full of sensations An...

Kawaii Bear Toy Sprinkler

$24.99

Time to run bearfoot through the sprinkler! Our Inflatable Teddy Bear Sprinkler is so excited to be here, he's literally blushing and gushing rainbows!  He's so fun we can bearly stand it! But, thankfully he helps us tolerate the grizzly...

Always Be Yourself Unless You Can Be A Unicorn Gum

$1.99

Introducing, our Always Be Yourself Unless You Can Be A Unicorn Gum. Since you were a child, everyone's always told you to always be yourself.  This is great advice and should always be worn on your sleeve... unless you can be a unicorn. Be sure...

I Hate You Just Kidding Gum

$1.99

Do you think I'm kidding? Yeah, yeah... wasting time hating someone is like poisoning yourself and expecting the other person to die... or something insightful like that.   This could be fun gum to give your friend if you guys share an inside...

Just Hanging Around Sloth Lip Gloss

$4.99

Enjoy letting the day s'lip away Our Just Hanging Around Sloth Lip Gloss is vanilla flavored, and is just as sweet as can be! With his sunny disposition this smiling little fella is just who you want hanging around, so you can keep your lips moisturized...

Pretty Please With A Cherry On Top Hairpins

$9.99 $8.79

Sweet classic retro What is the sweetest way to top off any outfit?  Our Pretty Please With A Cherry On Top Hairpins of course! Not just for sundaes anymore, you can wear this charming hairpin, guilt-free, any day of the week...! Cherry...

3D Butterfly Tattoos

$4.99

The Butterfly Effect Our vibrantly colored 3D Butterfly Tattoos are a fun and beautiful illusion! These lifelike temporary tattoos pop off your body with three-dimensional shadowing that gives the appearance of a butterfly gently resting on you. Hey,...

Shine On You Crazy Diamond Shaped LED Earrings

$9.99

You're a shining star! When you're rocking our Shine On You Crazy Diamond Shaped LED Earrings, you're guaranteed to steal the show! The spotlight will always be on you(r ears!) While testing these products out we were totally impressed by how...

CBD Gummy Worms

$24.99

CBD is legal in all 50 states, y'all! Why settle for vaping or salves when our CBD Gummy Worms are just like the ones you remember from your childhood! These squirmy little wormies taste, look, smell, and feel the same. The only difference is that they...

Super Duper Scooper Giant Ice Cream Cone Snow Tube Sled

$24.99 $21.99

Snow Queen meets Dairy Queen I scream, you scream, we all scream while hanging on for dear life to our humongous Super Duper Scooper Giant Ice Cream Cone Snow Tube Sled! For the snow bunny with a sweet tooth... if a foot of fresh snow reminds you of...

Magical Mandala Glowing Locket Necklace

$16.99 $14.95

You glow girl! Our beautiful Magical Mandala Glowing Locket Necklace absorbs light to allow a peaceful glow in darkened conditions. The light sources’ intensity and method will bring out different luminous effects. Now you can let your inner...

Spicy Chili Pepper Lollipop

$4.99

Are you a sucker for spicy food?  Lovers of spicy food will just eat up our handmade Spicy Chili Pepper Lollipops! Each one of these chili-pepper-shaped hard candy pops is infused with real chili pepper bits, and pack a heat that can't be beat!...

Huggy Tiny Tree Frog Ear Cuff

$4.99

Your good luck charm! They say that when a lucky frog comes into your life that it's a sign of transformation and it may well spark many wonderful changes! Well that's just a little bit more than a tad exciting!  Our single Tiny Hugging Tree Frog...

Oh Lolli Lolli Lolli Lollipop Earrings

$6.99

Sweet earrings for a sweet gal! If you're a sucker for fun, our Oh Lolli Lolli Lolli Lollipop Earrings are the perfect fix for a boring day or a stale wardrobe! Sweeter than candy on a stick the eye-catching design of these rainbow swirly whirl...

Bag Of Unicorn Farts

$8.99

Top Unicorn Gift! Ode to Bag of Unicorn Farts  |  Sugar is sweet, lemons are tart.  |  We love you more than a Bag of Unicorn Farts! A perfect gift for the lovers, the dreamers and you!  It's not an illusion... we've...

Lip Shit Orange Mango Lip Balm

$6.99

You'll soon sea that discovering our Lip Shit Orange Mango Lip Balm is nearly as exciting as stumbling across a new mermaid + seahorse pal! We have never really understood the whole strapless bathing suit thing, but this merlady is really rocking the...

Pantone Magnet Set + Daily Mood Flip Chart

$9.99

Color us happy!  Our painfully hip Pantone Magnet Set + Daily Mood Flip Chart brings the iconic thought leader on color, PANTONE, to your refrigerator or office with this one-of-a-kind magnet set! Just imagine how awesome your gallery of kiddie...

Hatch and Grow Panda

$4.99

It's beary awesome! Our Magic Growing Panda allows you to hatch your very own panda and watch it grow! Stumped on what to get your favorite panda lover? Maybe you just can't handle the responsibility of owning a pet. The walking, the feeding, the vet...

Kawaii Cross-Stitch Kit

$9.99

Fruitie cutie craft! Our adorable Kawaii Cross-Stitch Kit gives kawaii fans everywhere all the materials to stitch super-cute designs! The designs make perfect, sweet little gifts that are super cute, colorful and sure to bring a smile to to everyone's...

I Go All The Way Dish Towel

$10.99

The double entendre of our I Go All The Way Dish Towel is nearly as satisfying as a double hot fudge sundae with a cherry (and a pound of gummies) on top! We should know, having been a proud member of the Clean Plate of the Month Club since 1985. A...

Mini Bob Ross By The Numbers Painting Kit

$9.99

There's nothing wrong with having a tree as a friend. Our teeny tiny Mini Bob Ross by the Numbers Painting Kit will encourage you to discover the joy of painting, just like Bob Ross himself! Happy little trees and cloulds, here we come! Spoiler Alert!...

Cream-Pop Lollipops

$3.99

They're the cream of the crop! A dream-cicle come true, our Cream-Pop Lollipops are designed to look like classic ice-cream pops! They come on a thick wooden pop-sicle stick in six different exciting color and flavor combinations! Strawberry/Vanilla...

Motherf*cking Girl Power Socks

$10.99

Socks For The Alpha Females In Your Live Whether you're kicking back or kicking @ss our Motherf*cking Girl Power Socks will be there to cheer you on! And trust us.. those naysayers will get your message loud and clear! Don't even get us star'ted on how...

John Lennon's Imagine Crank Music Box

$8.99

Crank up that song! You may say I'm a dreamer, but we know that our delightfully peaceful Imagine Crank Music Box is a gift that will truly resonate with the receiver... and the surface that it's placed on! This music box is tiny in size, but the sound...

Talking Bob Ross Bobblehead

$12.99

Let’s get crazy, what the heck.  Our Talking Bob Ross Bobblehead is an homage to everyone's favorite squirrel loving, magical-voice-having, happy tree painting philosophical artist of TV fame. No one gave better art / life lessons while...

CBD Sour Gummy Smiling Emojis

$24.99

CBD edibles have arrived! Good luck trying to wipe that smile off your face! Too peopley outside? No problem! Reach for your jar of CBD Sour Gummy Smiling Emojis and your social anxiety will run for the hills, instead of you! These smiley face...

Mom Tattoo Bandages

$5.99

Call your mom, she worries! Our iconic Mom Tattoos are a classic ode to the lady that raised you. She bathed you, fed you, tucked you in at night and even rubbed her own spit on your face to get the dirt off. Over the years, many have shown their...

You Wanna Piece of This Oven Mitt

$12.99

Go on and take it. Our aggressively coy You Wanna Piece of This Oven Mitt will strike a chord with all of the food pushers out there. We're looking at you Grandma! Sorry, did that sound like a threat? What I meant was that you'd be reallllllly sorry if...

I Talk To My Dog Like It's A Wittle Baby Gum

$1.99

You got a problem with that? I'm not embarrassed,  I Talk To My Dog Like It's A Wittle Baby For Some Weason... My fur baby, my soulmate, the love of my life! You're sho shmarth Whath did you do thoday? Ready for beddy bye? Did you mishsh...

Mini Himalayan Rock Salt Mood Lamp

$12.99

Rainbows Rock! Our adorably Mini Himalayan Rock Salt Mood Lamp is made from real salt and rotates through a rainbow of colors! While standard Himalayan salt lamps glow orange (or pink), this mini-size mood lamp rotates through a full spectrum of colors,...

The Screaming Goat Mini Book + Figure

$9.99

Office mascot and spirit animal. For when there are no words, The Screaming Goat Mini Book + Figure speaks your language. The ultimate stress reliever, you can no become the owner of your very own screaming goat! Sh*t just goat serious. Let it goat...

Hey Jude Crank Music Box

$8.99

Hey Jude, crank that song up! Take a sad song and make it better with our heart warming Hey Jude Crank Music Box! It is a gift that will truly resonate with the receiver... and the surface that it's placed on! This music box is tiny in size, but the...

Pour Some Sugar in Me Mug

$11.99

Sweet toothed Def Leopard fan? Our totally def Pour Some Sugar in Me Mug is going to help you rock your mornings! Yeah! Sugar me! Do you take sugar? one lump or two? Whichever way you take it, holding a generous 16 ounces, this mug will keep you...

Dinosaur Poop Lollipop

$4.99 $3.99

You saur it here first! There's no bones about it, our Dinosaur Poop Lollipops are mammoth hit with dino lovers!  Melville Candy dinosaur poop lollipops are a fun unique sweet treat Hard candy green and blue swirl lollipops Coated with glittery...

Marshmallow S'More Lip Gloss

$4.99

You'll love it a lil bit s'more every day. An ideal gift for the happy camper, our Marshmallow S'More Lip Gloss is a fun mashup of nostalgia and kawaii for your lips! Camping. Maybe you do it for the crackling warmth of a radiant campfire. Good times...

Thank You For Being A Friend Bracelet

$1.99

Third grade flashbacks! Our bright and colorful Thank You For Being A Friend Bracelet will bring you back to knotty times on the bus with a safety pin attached to your jeans, and a fist full of colorful sewing floss. A timeless symbol of friendship,...

Here Comes The Sun Crank Music Box

$8.99

Where's that sun? Here comes the sun and the feels with our Here Comes the Sun Crank Music Box! It is a gift that will truly resonate with the receiver... and the surface that it's placed on! This music box is tiny in size, but the sound it gives off is...

I'm Shy? No Sh*t Women's Socks

$10.99

If I wasn't shy, I'd burn all the "Ask Me" buttons. Call me shy one more time, I triple dog dare you. Our I'm Shy? No Shit Women's Crew Socks may be the right fit for you too if you are fine with the following: Never initiating conversation ✓ Groups of...

My Gift To You Cat Butt Mug

$11.99

Bottom's up! It's time to get cat-ffeinated with our My Gift To You Cat Butt Mug! It's the purrfect way to serve up a little hair of the cat. You have opinions, but sometimes you can't say them out loud. Butt.. our cheeky little kitty mug will be...

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