birthday cards + gifts

Damn girl, Mother Earth is looking hot! The tongue-in-cheek How Do You Keep Getting Hotter Every Year Birthday Card (carbon) is the perfect birthda...

Another birthday? You've got to be kitten! When it just doesn't seem paw-sible, our You're How Old? Bitch Please Card will purrfectly deliver your ...

Happy birthday, you magnificent son of a bunny! Our Happy Fucking Birthday Bunny may look innocent, but this furball has a mouth as dirty as a pigs...

Hit me, baby, one more time! Hey there, birthday diva! Are you ready to get down and groove like it's 1999? Our Britney It's Your Birthday Bitch Bi...

You're an ass, but in a good way! Our Happy Birthday To A Badass Mother Fucker Card is absolutely not appropriate for your grandma... Even if she i...

Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's.. ow that frickin' hurt! 🫣 Ahhh.. the joys of getting older! Our hilarious Mascara Injury Birthday Card is a f...

Let's Taco bout your birthday! This spec-taco-lar Happy Birthday Taco Card is perfect for anyone who properly appreciates the taco, or fine dining ...

Who are you calling old? Birthday grrrrrl, you're barking up the wrong tree! Extremely pup-ular amongst dog lovers, our You're Not Old You're Vinta...

Ready to get fish tanked? No accomplishment is o-fish-al until you’ve had a chance to celebrate with cocktails! Better get your drinking flippers o...

It's a little childish and stupid... so are birthdays. Can you think of someone to give our Bueller Birthday Card to? Anyone, anyone? Of course, yo...

Get me my glasses and an ibuprofen... I'm Telling You Kid, Growing Old Ain't For Sissies... Getting older is actually pretty cool with all of the l...

Thistle help make it the best birthday ever. So fresh and so green, green... our Crazy Plant Lady Birthday Card is an unbelievably fun way to say “...

This scented pen really takes the cake! Cupcakes are ALWAYS a GOOD idea! So is having a favorite pen on you! Our yummy Vanilla Cupcake Scented Pen ...

Zach Morris called. He wants his fanny pack back. Our totally rad 1980's Retro Fanny Pack Greeting + Money Holder Card lets your gift recipient kno...

Chardon-hey girl, hey! 💁‍♀️🍷 Aren't birthdays just grape?! While not all of us age like fine wine or appreciate the finest puns, that's okay. We ca...

It's Sherbet Day! Get ready to send a splash of sweetness and a burst of joy straight into someone's day with this scrumptiously adorable Sherbet D...

Olly olly oxen free! Our obnoxiously fun Happy Birthday You Old F*ck Card features that little asshole Billy shouting his birthday message so you c...

Age is just a number, right? Our Going To Bed At 9PM Birthday Card is a great card to give someone that used to party but in recent years is maybe ...

The gift your cat thought you kneaded 😸🤍 Celebrating the joys of pet parenthood our Cat Hairball Birthday Greeting offers a gut-wrenching, heartfel...

Happy Birthday, you get a card! You get a card! You get a card! Welcome to the "You Get a Card" birthday bonanza with our Oprah Happy Birthday Card...

It's funny because it's true. From the self-proclaimed comedian (and favorite child) in the family, this Birthday Card is sure to live up their rep...

Goodness Cretaceous, great balls of fire! Celebrate your friends and family getting one year closer to their personal extinction level event with ...

Polish them boots and get ready for a Dolly-rific birthday blast! Yeehaw! Saddle up, birthday darlin', 'cause this Dolly Happy Birthday Darlin' Car...

The cutest card, sight-unseen! Blind-side them with our adorable You Look Great For Your Age Birthday Card, a double whammy of a back-handed compl...